Sunday, November 18, 2012

How To Be A Boring Person

Are you living in the Kingdom of The Bore? [Pic]

How to be a boring person? I assure you it is not difficult.

Before I go further, take this quick question: On a scale of 1 to 10, "1" being "I am totally exciting to be with" and 10 being "I am a true blue bore", give yourself a rating. 

Let me show you how you can work yourself towards the pinnacle of being a totally boring person. Check it out:

15. Stay Uninformed

We are in an era of 'information overload'. Be kind and don't kill yourself. You don't have to know what is going on.  

14. Don't bother taking care of yourself

Go ahead and eat and drink yourself silly. After all, you only live once. Who has time for exercise?

13. Watch lots of soap opera

Oh yes, those mind-numbing, satirical, slapstick and long-drawn drama. What other better ways to kill time?

12. Be a creature of habit

Make sure you always eat the same food, do the same thing, shop at the same place and talk about the same stuff. Haven't you heard of the phrase "tried and tested"? 

11. Stay indoor

Stay clear from the elements. You wouldn't want to be drenched by the rain or tanned by the sun. Not to mention the wind and the snow, nature can be scary.

Are you a copycat? [Pic]

10. Be totally predictable

Why make it difficult for people around you? Just stay the same all the time. No one needs surprises in life, pleasant or otherwise.
 
9. Be a copycat

It doesn't pay to be original. If others have done it, just follow (ie copy). Don't waste your time finding new ideas and creating new stuff.

8. Don't participate in any conversation

Be gracious. Let others talk about anything they want. In turn, you would just talk about yourself. It won't go wrong and you stand no chance in offending anyone. 
7. Stay with your same old friends

They know you so well and you can continue to be yourself. There is no need to worry about social etiquette and they will love you just the same even if your right sock is pulled higher than the other. New friends are hard to come by. Don't even try.

6. Stay serious 

Jokes can be funny but they can also be dangerously offensive. Don't be goofy.

Sit on the fence. It is safer. [Pic]


5. Be a fence-sitter

Wouldn't it be safe to just stay neutral? You would offend no one. Let others make the decision and you stay agreeable. Everyone will love you for never saying 'No' to them.

4. Don't ask questions

Questions are dangerous. You may stumble on a taboo topic. Play safe and don't even ask questions such as "how is your day?" or "do you keep pets?"

3. Don't change your views

Be consistent. If others offer differing perspectives, stay firm. Don't be swayed by new ideas. Old wisdom is the best.

2. Don't read

Haven't you done enough of that in school? Who needs to read once college days are over? 

1. Don't learn new stuff

I am sure you are already good at your job. Keep it that way and there is no need to learn anything new. You wouldn't want to be a Jack of all trade and a master of none. After all, things are changing so fast nowadays, why bother to chase after them?


Check your 'Boring Index'. Bring it down. [Pic]

You didn't think I was serious, did you?

Seriously, am I describing you in any way? If you find yourself scoring high as a boring person, it is time to take stock of your life. I know it is not criminal to be a bore but you would rather not spend your one and only lifetime being one.

I wouldn't.

Check out articles under the Motivation label. They might help you bring down your 'boring index' to a healthier level.




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Saturday, June 9, 2012

Say No to 'Not Saying No'

1st step: Ask, why you don't say 'no'?. [pic]

How often do you say 'Yes' when you really mean 'No'? Are you doing so at the expense of yourself?

I guess these could be some of your reasons:

  • You want to please.
  • You don't like conflicts.
  • You see 'saying-no' as being rude.
  • You don't want someone to think less of you.
  • You want to help.
  • You hate to disappoint.
  • You fear losing the opportunity.

2nd step: Say, "It's OK to say 'no'". [pic]

You need to change your mindset about agreeing to everything. Saying 'no' is about respecting your own time and space. Saying 'no' won't get you into trouble but the way you say it might.

When should you say 'no?

1. When your plate is too full

You do not want to tip the balance. If you keep accepting one task after another, you are going to start showing your inability to do your best.  Stretching yourself too thin is not good for yourself and those you intend to help.

2. When it is against your value or belief

You are not obliged to help every other cause on earth. Others don't expect you to do so too.

3. When you are not in the position to help

Give the matter a fair assessment. You may not be the best person to accept the task. Be ready to say 'no' and help the requester by giving alternatives.


3rd step: When to say 'no'. [pic]

Dos and don'ts

1. Do not feel guilty

Think of it as doing yourself and others a favor. Taking on too much and not doing your best is not a responsible act. If you decline to donate to a cause you do not support, others can understand. Surely you have the right to decide what to do with your time and money.

2. Be honest

Out of desperation, you may be tempted to come up with excuses. Don't! You may call them 'white lies' but lies are lies. Besides, your ill-designed excuses may land you in trouble if it is later found out that they are untrue.

3. Be polite

Saying 'no' does not mean being hostile. Say it sincerely and thank the requester for considering your involvement.

4th step: How to say 'no'. [pic]

4. Offer alternatives

You may not be the only person who can execute the task. Consider someone else who can benefit from the additional exposure. Check with him or her and if it is appropriate, suggest their names as alternatives.

5. Be persistent

Some requesters do not take 'no' for an answer. You would need to stay firm towards such unreasonable behaviors. If you do not draw your own boundary, you can't blame others for encroaching on your space.

6. Give yourself time

When an immediate answer is not required, allow yourself some time to consider the matter before you decline. When you eventually say 'no', the initial impact on the requester would have been much cushioned.

5th step: Don't abuse your right to say 'no'. [pic]

Finally, saying 'no' doesn't mean not saying 'yes'. Don't make 'saying-no' a habit and use it to wriggle out of situations you ought to face. If you say 'no' because you procrastinate, you are missing the point.

Be genuine. You want to do your best at all times. Saying 'no' is not a strategy to skive.

Let's sum it up in 5 steps:
1. Find out why you don't say 'no'.
2. Tell yourself it is OK to say 'no'.
3. Know when to say 'no'.
4. Learn how to say 'no.
5. Don't abuse your right to say 'no'.

Related articles:
"Don't be a People Pleaser".

"Don't raise your voice; improve your argument." (Desmond Tutu)



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Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Reverse the Polarity - Stay Positive

Learn to stay positive in a negative world. [pic]

I won't disagree if you say we live in a negative world. 

Everyday, there seems to be more bad news in the media than anything encouraging. Good news, if any, tend to be greeted with some skepticism and suspicion. 

Closer to you, your workplace, school or home may also be filled with negativity pits. You can fall in them easily.

Negativity is very contagious. It drains your energy and reduce the quality of your life. It is just like flu bug and you wouldn't want to catch it. 

Staying positive in a negative environment is a life skill. [Pic]

Just how do you stay positive in a negative environment? 

I do not have a quick fix and I would not promise that it is simple. All I can say is that, if you start doing something about it now, it will get easier. 

There are 8 tips to start you off: 

8. Conduct self-check 
Be aware of your own behavior. Are you participating in negative actions? Does your contribution to negativity help to fuel more negativity in you? Do you really feel good after indulging in some negative whining or is it just a temporary reprieve? 

7. Stay away 
If the negative comments are directing at other people, choose not to participate. Being away from the gossip pot, you avoid being contaminated. 

6. Be constructive 
If you think you can reduce the negative energy, stay on to help. Be positive. Your constructive comments can be empowering and make everyone around feel better. Be generous with praises but be genuine at the same time. 

Train your ears to hear positive things. [Pic]

5. Hear only the good things 
If you choose to stay on to find out more, stay focused on your main objective. You want to know what you can do about it rather than making the situation worse. For every negative comment you hear, ask, "how does it affect me and what can I do about it?".

4. Learn from criticism
If the negative comments are directed at you, accept it positively with a view to learn. Ask what you could have done to avoid triggering such comments. See "Go Ahead, Criticize Me". 

Criticism is not necessary a bad thing. [Pic]

3. Avoid self-blame 
Negative comments aiming at you can be demoralizing. You will have nothing to gain if you bash yourself up. Instead, look out for things you can do better. See "How to Feel Better When Feeling Battered ?". 

2. Beat the blues 
Negativity can hit you really bad especially during the times when you are still learning how to cope with it. Meanwhile, pick up some survival tips. See "Up Your 'Feel Good Factor'". 

1. Do the LOL 
Even negative stuff can be funny if you know how to see the lighter side of things. A little humor goes a long way. Sometimes, it is a fine line between 'making our job fun' and 'making fun of our job'

Your environment is as negative as you allow it to be. [Pic]

Keep negativity low and don't let it sap precious energy from you. Just like negative energy, positive energy can also be infectious. Start small and start wherever you are. See it grow and up the energy level around you and in you. 

Staying positive in a negative environment is a life skill. Learn it early. Your environment is as negative as you allow it to be.


"Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will." (Zig Ziglar)

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Sunday, April 15, 2012

Today I Don't Feel Like Doing Anything

Some days you just don't feel just doing anything. [pic]

It is simple to understand why "The Lazy Song" by Bruno Mars is popular. (Video below)

We all can relate to how on some days, we just don't feel like doing anything. We do not usually know why but we certainly wish we can do something about it.

There is nothing wrong with feeling that way. Even positive people need some 'pick-me-ups' sometimes.


I have my fair share of such days and here are some of the things I would do to pick myself up. Try some of them and devise some of your own:

10. Play your favorite tune

Music can alter your energy level. Pick something lively to spur your mood. Avoid any blue or sombre numbers. See "Music : My Multivites"

9. Take a shower

Looking dowdy makes you feel down. Get a quick shower and do something to make yourself look refreshed. Your mood will change for the better.

8. Work on your list

Take out your to-do list. Pick the easiest task and act on it. Your quick win will give you some energy to move on to the next task. See "The Power of Small Steps".


Get out of the house for a short walk. [pic]

7. Leave the house

Bitching around in the house can only make matter worse. Get yourself out of the house and do something else. It doesn't have to be anything ambitious. A stroll along a quiet lane can do wonders. See "Up Your 'Feel Good Factor'".
 
6. Exercise

This is too cliche, I know. There is a good reason why this appears everywhere. Do it and you will know why.

5. Change what you say to yourself

The last thing you want to do is to further dampen your own spirit. Say empowering and positive things to yourself instead of something that makes you feel less worthy. See "Self Dialog: Look Who's Talking? " and "You Are Your Worst Enemy".

Nature can be inspiring. [pic]


4. Get some inspiration

Read an up-lifting short story or watch an inspirational video. Such a shift of perspective allows you to feel grateful and energized. See "Picture Blog #4 : Still Complaining?".

3. Don't feel sorry for yourself

Wallowing in self pity is an indulgent behavior. Much time is wasted and nothing good comes out of it. Life does not beat you. You do. See "How to Feel Better When Feeling Battered ?

2. Get yourself a little "Me Time"

This is especially so for moms. Taking care of others begins with taking care of yourself. See "A Little "Me Time" Goes A Long Way".

1. Smile

It costs you nothing but brings loads of benefits. Here are '10 benefits of smiling'.


There are many more ways to get back on track. Sometimes, a simple cup of good coffee would do the trick for me. It takes you to know you best. Do what you can to "Get Yourself a "Cheer Up' First Aid Kit". 

Instead of Bruno Mars' "The Lazy Song", I shall leave you to listen to Diana Krall's "Pick Yourself Up". (Video above)

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again...

You might also want to read:

"Act as if you were already happy and that will tend to make you happy." (Dale Carnegie)

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Saturday, April 7, 2012

Is Draw Something Really So Drawsome?

Draw Something, the insanely popular overnight hit.

For the uninitiated, Draw Something is a mobile app which allows you to...well, draw something. (Full tour of the app)

Since OMGPOP released it on 24th Feb 2012, the game has surpassed 50 million downloads in 50 days. That makes it the fastest growing mobile games to date.

It is not surprising why Zynga was willing to pay OMGPOP a staggering US$200 million for Draw Something, just a month after its release.

Zynga paid $200mill for Draw Something. (pic source)

What is Draw Something?

It is a simple game which fuses the features of Pictionary and anagram. Players take turn to draw and guess. They earn coins for each correct guess and use them to purchase 'bombs' or 'colors'.

'Bombs' take away some letters making it easier to unscramble. Adding colors to the palette presumably will make doodles more expressive and fanciful.

Downloads are free. However, the paid version is ad-free and has more words. 

Millions are hooked on the games. (Raiders: pic source)

Is it really so 'Drawsome'?

I am one of the millions of players, attracted to the game and getting endless amusement from doodles of varying quality.

Drawing has never been my forte. However, Draw Something has attracted every other person on the street to come on board. I don't feel out of place nor intimidated playing it with my limited doodling ability.

Simple caveman drawing is good enough. (Karate: pic source)

Personally, I find the game so simple that it hurts. Anyone who can draw like a caveman qualifies. However, as an online game, Draw Something is actually quite suckish.

Here's why.

1. No one wins

There are no winners or losers in this game. It just goes on and on through the motion of drawing and guessing. After awhile, it gets stale.

This seems to defy the meaning of 'game' when the competitive element is missing.

2. Lack commercial motives

Many online games lure addicted players to part with their real money. In return, they get a greater ability to perform in the game. This is not the case for Draw Something. You only earn virtual money to buy bombs or colors and there are no in-app purchases.

I suspect Zynga have something up their sleeves. I am waiting to see how the game will be revamped for greater sustainability.

3. Lack player motivation

There is no level-up in this game. You keep earning coins rounds after rounds. You can only use them to buy bombs or colors which you don't really need.

The game keeps some statistics such as 'longest streak', 'average guess speed' and 'average draw speed'. Interestingly, the 'longest streak' does not go beyond 99.

Those stats are not really capable of motivating players to want to do more or better. They offer some bragging rights, at most.

4. It is buggy

There are some bugs awaiting fixes. However, this is common with new online games. For example, your opponent may receive your drawing with letters from a different game. 

Use colors for a reason. (pic source)

Be 'Drawsome'

If you are new to Draw Something or feeling a little bored with it, here are some tips for you.

1. Use colors (for a reason)

Use them to emphasize or differentiate. Unnecessary use of colors can only distract your opponent.

2. Don't act like you are Picasso

It is a game, not a drawing contest. The idea is to get your opponent to understand you through your doodle. There is really nothing wrong with just drawing stick men. Unless you wish to irritate your opponent, don't spend time perfecting your drawing to match your desired art quality.

3. Don't write

The game is named Draw Something, not 'Write Something'. Respect your opponent's ability to guess and don't resort to writing anything on your drawing.

Use arrows to guide. (Poop: pic source)

4. Draw arrows

Use arrows to bring the point across. Point to the part of the drawing which lead to the answer. Use a different color for the arrows so that they do not look like part of the drawing.

5. Break up the words

Some words are easier to draw if you break them up. For example, draw a 'cow' and a 'girl' in separate drawings, instead of a 'cowgirl'.

6. Get online help

Clueless with the drawing? Take a screen shot and post it on social network platform such as Facebook. Help will flow in.

Don't write something. Draw! (pic source)

7. Watch those letters

Tired of shuffling and run out of bombs? Take a screen shot of the given letters. Close the game and log back in. You will get a new set of letters. Repeat this a few times and look out for recurring letters. The answers would be from these letters.

8. Skip game without pass

If you are stuck and want to move on to play with another player, you don't have to pass. Follow these steps:
  1. Click Home Button then double click Home Button.
  2. Your app tray will go up and show some icons below.
  3. Touch the Draw Something icon and hold for 5s.
  4. Touch the red dot to close the app.
  5. Double click Home Button.
  6. Start the app again.
    9. Get new words

    Struggling to chose one the three equally difficult words? You don't have to use a bomb to get new words. Follow the steps in (8). The set of words will be refreshed.


    10. Get Anagram help

    Don't be too quick to use the bomb. Try an anagram solver and you may just hit the answer. There are many anagram solvers on the web. 'Draw Something Words' and 'Drawsome Words' seem to be made for this game.

    11. Use a stylus

    Sick of drawing with your fat finger on the tiny smartphone screen? Try a stylus. Steve Jobs didn't believe in stylus. However, like it or not, stylus is making a comeback, thanks to Draw Something.

    Stylus for touch screen (pic source)

    I consider tips 7 to 10 cheats. However, you may say that it's only a game. I shall leave it to you to clear your conscience.

    I don't find Draw Something great in any spectacular way. However, 50 million players can't be that wrong. For now, there is no doubt that it has created a storm. The real question is in its sustainability. We shall wait for Zynga to do something to keep Draw Something going!

    Before you go, take a look at these great drawings shared by some proud players. Have a good laugh and get some inspiration.

    I wish you a 'drawsome' day!
    "I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination." (Albert Einstein)

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    Sunday, March 18, 2012

    Keep Dreaming, Babe!

    'Stop Daydreaming' is not a good advice. [Pic]


    I daydream a lot and I feel guilty at times.

    I have my fair share of "Stop Dreaming" from concerned and irate teachers. I grew up thinking that, daydreaming is bad. 

    The truth is, there is no need to be so apologetic about it. I come to realize that.

    Here are my reasons why daydreaming is not necessarily a bad thing. You have my full permission to daydream as you run down the list:

    8. You can't avoid it

    Psychologists estimates that we daydream naturally and we do so up to half the time during our waking hours. You either let it ruin you or make good use of it.

    Manage stress. Take a short 'vacation'. [Pic]
    7. Relax and cope

    Daydreaming helps you to cope with the harsh reality. Didn't you feel good taking that five-minute 'vacation' in your mind while you were studying for tests?

    6. Up productivity

    It sounds like an oxymoron but believe it, daydreaming can improve productivity. Take a short break and let your dull mind wander. See how a recharged mind can improve your mood. Go back to your chores and you will find yourself completing them within a shorter time.

    5. Relieve boredom

    Escape to a more exciting place when you are doing some boring routines such as driving through a traffic jam or chopping onions. The same can be done during some unproductive meetings.

    Get fresh ideas with free-flowing minds. [Pic]

    4. Get new ideas

    You can achieve anything in your dream, I mean, daydream. Let your mind bring you to the level you hope to attain and see new ideas emerging as you weave through your dreams.

    3. Do it again, this time correctly

    We make mistakes. Instead of brooding over it and feeling sorry, try daydreaming. Bring your mind back to the scene and see how you could have done it differently.

    2. Be totally yourself

    We live a rather measured life in the real world. We control what we say and do. When you daydream, you are totally free to be who you would like to be. Amaze yourself with some of the hidden talents you might have. 

    1. Find 'eureka moments'

    Sometimes you need a breakthrough and need to see things from a totally new perspective. Your wandering mind might just be your ride to the answer.

    For creativity, your mind needs to wander. [Pic]
    Daydreaming is not for all situations. I hope you know that. All I am saying here is that they are not entirely bad. Before I wrote this article, I had my moments of daydreaming, just to think of what to write.

    The next time you daydream, write down your ideas before they dissipate into thin air. You will never know, something big may be coming your way.

    Keep dreaming!

    Similar article


    "You see things; and you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were; and I say, 'Why not?'" (George Bernard Shaw)

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    Monday, March 5, 2012

    A Little "Me Time" Goes A Long Way

    Moms, learn the importance of "Me Time". [Pic]

    Moms, this article is for you...

    We live in a fast-pace world and everyone seems to be busy getting their endless tasks done. Amongst all, mothers seem to have the widest range of chores. (Moms, say aye if you agree).

    My mom was a homemaker, a business assistant (to my dad), an educator (despite her lack of education), a cook (of gourmet standards), the CEO, CFO and COO of our household.

    I have always admired her ability to manage so much.

    Moms fill their schedule to the brim - for others. [Pic]

    Fast forward to my time as a mother.

    Compared to my mom, I am more educated and have much more means to get things done. Somehow, there is just insufficient time to do much of what I want to do. I guess having more resources is not the answer after all.

    Many mothers are in the same boat.

    A mom's schedule

    Instinctively, a mom wants to do all the chores in the world if she thinks they are helpful to her family. It is therefore not surprising to find a mom's schedule being filled to the brim.

    Typically, something very important is amiss: "Me Time". There is usually hardly anything dedicated to mom in a mom's time table.

    Set time for yourself and yourself only. [Pic]

    What is "Me Time"?

    For a mother, "Me Time" is the time taken to do something for herself and herself only. No children, husband or other family members should be involved. Even if they are, the focus should be on mom.

    So, moms, "Me Time" can be spent for your enrichment, social network, health or spiritual wellness.

    Why is "Me Time" important?

    Even the best car in the world has stop at the gas station. "Me Time" is the time you recharge your energy. It allows you to put back what you have given to others. This is so that you can be ready to give more.

    "Me Time" can be a simple walk in the park. [Pic]

    What to do during "Me Time"?

    Some find this a tough question for they have not had much of a "Me Time" before.

    The answer is simple: Do something that is outside your routine and let yourself be surprised by what you might experience.

    Here are some of the things you can consider:
    • Call an old friend and chat
    • Pamper yourself in a spa
    • Have an afternoon tea with your pals
    • Watch a play or movie
    • Visit a museum
    • Attend a health talk
    • Read an inspiring story
    • Do brisk walking in the park
    • Write in a journal
    The list goes on. If you don't feel like doing any of the above, you could just sit by the beach and watch the world go by.

    There you go, "Me Time" is just time to do something simple for yourself. You do not need to rip your schedule apart in order to accommodate some of the above items.

    Loving others begins with loving yourself. [Pic]

    Why no "Me Time"?

    If it is so easy, why are so many moms not giving themselves any "Me Time"?

    Firstly, (1) they may not be aware of its importance. Secondly, even if they are, (2) they may not have the habit to do so. See "The Power of Habit".

    With this article, I hope you are done with (1). It is really just a matter of acquiring the right habit to weave some "Me Time" into your schedule. Check your schedule now and slot in some "Me Time".

    Taking care of others begins with taking care of yourself.

    Do it now.

    "Self-love, is not so vile a sin as self-neglecting." (William Shakespeare)

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    Monday, February 27, 2012

    Get Rich, Now!

    Richness in life is more than just having money. [Pic]

    What you want is not necessarily what you need.

    You want the car your neighbor just bought; you want the watch you saw in the magazine; you want a pair of heels even though your wardrobe is bursting; you want to be able to have whatever you want...

    Is that what life is all about?

    In our endless pursuit of worldly things, we could have easily forgotten the essentials of life which are far more important than money. 

    Discipline: A key ingredient to healthy lifestyle. [Pic]

    There is nothing very new here. Let's just take a moment to remind ourselves:

    1. Health

    You need two ingredients to stay healthy: 1) knowing what the right actions are, and 2) the discipline to do the right actions.

    For (1), rich resources can be found easily in this modern time. Few would have difficulties accessing basic information. It is 'discipline' or the lack of, that is often cited as the main culprit for an unhealthy lifestyle.

    To stay healthy, work hard on (1) and work harder on (2). 


    2. Habit

    A habit is a series of actions performed involuntarily and rather effortlessly. Bad habits are common obstacles in life. They can hurt your health or social life. On the other hand, good habits are empowering.

    You need to kick bad habits and acquire good ones. Do not expect quick results. Start with being aware of your existing habits and take small but ceaseless steps to change your actions.


    Love what you do. Do What you love. [Pic]

    3. Work

    A rich life is no fluke. You have to work for what you want.

    'Work' is more than just what you do in your office and you should stop viewing it as a dirty word. Take control and you will not have to fight any Monday blues.

    The mantra for this is, 'love what you do and do what you love.'


    4. Gratitude

    Feeling grateful gives you positive energy. On the other hand, complains and grouses are dis-empowering.

    Whining is not a necessity but a bad habit. Kick it.


    Gratitude makes you rich.  [Pic]

    5. Happiness

    Everyone wants to be happy. Many go looking for it or simply wait for it to come.

    The thing is, 'happiness' is here and now. This makes the phrase 'pursuit of happiness' rather ironical. It is not something you seek but something you 'agree' to have.

    In short, 'happiness' is a choice. You would have to make that choice to be happy.


    6. Wisdom

    Get wiser through lifelong learning. 

    In today's breakneck pace of change, you cannot afford to be left behind. The price of obsolescence is just too high.

    Learning does not mean going to school. It simply means keeping up with things. It should take place during every waking moment.

    You stop, you flop.


    Every man dies. Not every man really lives. [Pic]

    Finally, let talk about money.

    In a practical sense, you cannot live a decent life without money. However, having more money does not promise a happier life.

    No one argues about this. The problem is, as Zig Ziglar has put it "Money won't make you happy… but everybody wants to find out for themselves."


    Many people have been there, done that. You have the choice of learning from them or falling into the same pit.

    Your life is as you live it.

    "Every man dies. Not every man really lives." (William Wallace)

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