Let's Look At It This Way

10 Tips to Avoid Festive Bingeing

2012-01-23T00:26:00.001+08:00

This is the time to feast, wisely. [Pic]

The feasting has begun.

The Chinese New Year is celebrated over a period of 15 days. Typically, families and businesses arrange for get-togethers over meals. Singapore is a food paradize and it is even more so during festivals. You can expect great indulgence during this festive time. (See "The 15 Days of Lunar New Year")

If you are thinking of not falling prey to binge eating, this article is for you. Read it before your next party.

Spend more quality time with people, not food. [Pic]

10. Do not over prepare

Leftovers are traditionally seen as something good. It means you are wealthy enough to provide, in this case, over-provide. Symbolism aside, if you prepare the right portion, you do not have to decide if the leftovers should go to waste or 'waist'.

9. Get enough rest

Lack of rest can increase your stress level. Typically, a stressed-out person is more inclined towards binge eating. (See "It's Time to Chill Out, Not Stress Out")

8. Learn to say 'No'

I know, this may cause grandma to be upset. But I am not suggesting that you refuse her offer. You just need to know when to stop and say 'No' when the time comes. If saying 'No' gets too tough, distract and flatter her by asking for her secret recipes. (See "Don't be a People Pleaser")

You are spoilt for choices. Indulge wisely. [Pic]

7. No second helping

During the festive season, you are spoilt for choices. Take your time to sample. Avoid a second helping of your favorite cookies as it usually doesn't stop at two.

6. Don't compensate with exercise

If your strategy is to back up your binge eating with a more rigorous exercise regime, don't. This is likely to make you loath exercise especially if routine exercises don't come naturally or habitually to you.

5. Eat something before you go

Don't spoil your appetite by eating too much before the party. However, don't leave home feeling famished either. Otherwise, you will tend to gobble down the food as soon as you enter the house. Snack on something healthy beforehand.

4. Watch where you station

If you choose to socialize over the serving counter, you are likely to pinch some food between your conversations. Instead, move away and hold your conversation else where. You can always talk about bonsai next to the flower pots or discuss about Picasso near the paintings.

Snack on something healthy before going for a party. [Pic]

3. Be picky

You have so much food but no extra space in the tummy. You need to be selective. Avoid food that you can get at any other time. Pick something special and not something off the supermarket shelves.

2. Focus on people

Not eating everything on the table doesn't mean you are deprived in any way. Focus the celebration on people rather than food. You have had enough poking in Facebook. This is time to catch up with friends and relatives in the real world. (The article on "Are You A Good Conversationalist?" may help you)

1. Eat the right thing

This is too cliche and we can go on and on about what is the right food to eat. In short, eat in moderation and watch your calories. I will just let Dr Aaryan Koura from the Singapore Tan Tock Seng Hospital share more via this video.

May the Dragon Year bring you wealth as well as health !

"Lunar New Year Ang Pow 101"

"Beat the Spring Cleaning Blues"

"The 15 Days of Lunar New Year"a

"Wishing You A Blessed Year Ahead"

Reunion Dinner - Feasting Together

"When it comes to eating right and exercising, there is no 'I'll start tomorrow'. Tomorrow is disease." (Terri Guillemets)

Reunion Dinner - Feasting Together

2012-01-16T00:30:00.102+08:00

Spring Festival: An important Chinese traditional celebration. [Pic]

Tis the time to greet the spring.

Chinese New Year is also referred to as Lunar New Year (農曆新年) or Spring Festival (春节). It is the most important celebrations according to the Chinese traditions (23 Jan 2012). A reunion dinner (团圆饭) is one of the highlights or should I say, a must, for Chinese New Year celebration.

Reunion dinner brings everyone in the family together. [Pic]

Reunion dinner takes place on the eve (年除夕) of Chinese New Year. Family members who are away from home will make it back in time for the occasion. It is the time for everyone to catch up with each other. This is an important part of the Chinese traditions that helps keep the family bonded.

The feast is expected to be sumptuous. It is not only for a good time together but also to symbolize a good start of the new year.

Food: Its meaning comes before taste. [Pic]

What to eat?

It is important to include certain symbolic dishes in the reunion dinner.

Symbolization is usually drawn from the name of the dish sounding similar to words that mean good luck, wealth, prosperity and the like.

Dumpling, symbolizes gold ingots. [Pic]

These dishes are pronounced differently in different Chinese dialects. We can expect their significance to vary among the various Chinese dialect groups. Some dishes may also be included because they shape like certain auspiscious items.

Here are some examples:

Fish (鱼,余) - Surplus
Meat balls (圆) - Togetherness
Lettuce (生菜, sang choy 生财 in Cantonese)- Growth in wealth
Bamboo shoots (笋,顺) - Smooth sailing
Sea cucumber (海参, hoy sum 开心 in Cantonese) - Happiness
Green vegetable - Evergreen
Lotus roots (莲,连) - Togetherness
Fresh oyster (生蚝,升豪) - Rising to prosperity
Dried oyster (蚝豉 hou si 好事 in Cantonese) - Good things
Long noodle - Longevity
Black moss (发菜 fatt choy 发财 in Cantonese) - Wealth
Abalone (包余) - Guaranteed abundance
Dumpling (饺子) - Shaped like gold ingots
Shallot (葱,聪)- Wisdom
Celery (芹,勤) - Diligence
Chicken (served whole) - Completeness
Glutinous rice cake or niangao (年糕) - Promotion or progress
Yusheng (鱼生 lohei 捞起 in Cantonese) - Abundance.
(Note: Yusheng is not a traditional dish for reunion dinner but it is definitely a tradition in the making.)

It is fine to finish every dish but one - the fish dish. Some leftover will be intentionally kept aside. This symbolize 'surplus' derived from the Chinese phrase 'nian nian you yu' (年年有余) which literrally means , 'having surplus every year'.

It is convenient to eat out but not always pleasant. [Pic]

Eat in or out?

It is in the Chinese traditions to be home for the reunion dinner. Nothing beats having dinner at home and truly enjoy the warmth of the family.

However, in this fast-pace modern time, elaborate preparation for the feast is challenging. More people are loving the convenience of eating out. It has become so popular that advanced reservation is highly recommended especially at popular restaurants. In some restaurants in Singapore, diners are given time slots and are expected to complete their meals within the given time.

Yusheng, a tradition in the making. [Pic]

Restaurants are also competing to come up with innovative menus. Dishes are given prosperous sounding name and priced auspisciously, eg. S$388 or S$888. You will never find a reunion dinner package priced at $444. (See Numbers in Chinese culture)

There are only so many families a restaurant can take in at any one time. So, businesses have been quick in coming up with 'takeaway pacakges' giving the best of both worlds. You do not have to dine in a rush with so many strangers around you. However, this only works if you have sufficient room to accommodate everyone in the family.

Steamboat: An all-time favorite. [Pic]

Cooked dishes or steamboat?

Cooked dishes are wonderful as the ingredients can be prepared in many ways. However, you can only have so may dishes in one meal.

Steamboat (火锅) is a practical alternative to hold a reunion dinner. Everyone can add any imaginable ingredient in the bubbling broth, whipping up every possible combination of good luck and wealth in the soup.

Reunion dinners are being held earlier these days. [Pic]

Literally translated steamboat or huoguo means 'fire pot' in Chinese. It has its name originated from traditional steamboat which uses charcoal fire to heat the pot.

Traditionally, reunion dinner is also known as weilu (围炉) which means circling around the stove. From this, we can imagine how reunion dinner was held during the ancient time.

Traditionally, married daughters are excluded from reunion dinners. [Pic]

Eating with?

Traditionally, children away from home are expected to come back for the dinner. Married daughters will join their husbands and they will return home on the second day of the new year.

In Singapore, (694 km² / 268 sq mi) nobody lives more than an hour away from another. Married children continue to visit their parents regularly. Given this, the significance of reunion dinner is somewhat reduced to an occasion to feast rather than a time to reunite.

Where possible, parents would want to dine with all their children, son or daughter, married or otherwise. As such, it will not be possible for every family to hold reunion dinner on the eve of the new year. Nowadays, reunion dinner begins a week or two before the actual day.

It is not too early to start feasting now. Happy reunion and wishing you a prosperous Dragon year!

"Lunar New Year Ang Pow 101"

"Beat the Spring Cleaning Blues"

"It's Time to Chill Out, Not Stress Out"

"The 15 Days of Lunar New Year"

"Wishing You A Blessed Year Ahead"

"In the end, life teaches us what is important, and that is family." (Stephen Covey)

Beat the Spring Cleaning Blues

2012-01-10T00:15:00.000+08:00

If new year spring cleaning is on your to-do list, read on.

Traditionally, spring cleaning (春节大掃除) is done before Chinese New Year to welcome the new season with a clean house. This marks a new beginning with the hope to bring good luck.

The next Chinese New Year is only a couple of weeks away (23 Jan 2012) and there are loads of preparation to do. Traditionally, this is also the time to feel stressed out. With the sight of messy rooms, dusty shelves and unkept Christmas decorations, you just hope that you have another month.

Spring cleaning need not be a hair-pulling time. Take a look at a few pointers below. I hope the list will lessen your stress so that you can welcome the Dragon Year with a jolly mood.

10. Spring cleaning - Outsourced

If for some reasons, you are unable or unwilling to do the chores yourself, consider outsoursing. However, many cleaning companies would have their booking list filled up by now. Note this tip and make your reservation earlier next time.

Reserve spring cleaning service early. [Pic]

9. Spring cleaning - DIY

The tips will be too long to be included here. Just google "spring cleaning tips" and you will find loads of information. The idea here is to work smart and not just work hard.

8. Have a plan

Draw up a plan on what needs to be done. Handle a few items each day and that will prevent a last minute panic attack. Very often, we feel stressed out just thinking about what needs to be done. Getting something done (no matter how little) brings on satisfaction and that helps to motivate you.

7. Have a checklist

In the interest of time, you want to be systematic and save effort. Have a checklist (see example) which you can use every year. Pick tasks based on the amount of time allocated for the day.

Plan spring cleaning tasks and handle
them systematically. [Pic]

6. Stay healthy

The tendency is to work doubly hard and if possible, into late nights. That is usually not worth the while. You may end up spending more time later nursing yourself back to health. Falling sick during the festive time means missing out all the good food and fun. Don't.

5. Fight procrastination

Tomorrow sometimes never come. No one enjoys spring cleaning (you know anyone who does?) but you have to do what you have to do. Put your acts together and throw your excuses aside. See "Procrastination is Best Left Till Tomorrow".

4. Be disciplined

Ouch! The 'D' word hurts. But you need that in many things and that includes spring cleaning. Many people see 'Discipline' to be a big enemy which is hard to conquer. Get rid of that idea. 'Self Discipline' is a collection of good habits which you can build. Read more in "Choose Your Pain: Discipline or Regret".

Discipline is not a scary word. [Pic]

3. Stop multitasking

Contrary to popular beliefs, multitasking is in fact one of the main killers of productivity. You may think that you are getting much done. The truth is you are getting many tasks going but badly done. See "Farewell to Multitasking".

2. Be motivated

You need motivation not just for spring cleaning but everything else you do everyday. It is easy to feel unmotivated and you would need to know how to refuel. See "Get Your Daily Motivation".

1. Cheer up

Finally, if you are feeling down and can't get started, you need to fight the G Force and get up. You don't have much time left. See "Get Yourself a "Cheer Up' First Aid Kit".

Multitasking is not a good idea. [Pic]

Most importantly, do away with the need for spring cleaning. Keep your house clutter-free and buy only what you need. That makes daily cleaning easy and there will be less need, or better still, no need for an annual spring cleaning.

Let's welcome the Dragon Year with a set of new habits.

Flying with the Little One - 12 Tips

2012-01-02T01:38:00.000+08:00

Flying with children need not be a stressful experience. [Pic]

I loathe long hauls, especially when I have to share the same trip with a wailing child (not necessarily mine).

I don't have much experience flying with young children. However, each time when there is a grouchy little one on board, I can totally feel the kind of stress the minder has to go through.

If you have minded little ones on board, you would know what I mean.

You need to be flexible when traveling
with young children. [Pic]

Life for you and junior need not be that bad in the air. Take a look at some tips I have gathered from first hand experience and observation. I have also included what friends, relatives and some experts have shared.

You know your young traveling companion better. Be prepared to adjust along the way.

Let junior decide which toy to bring along. [Pic]

12. Before the trip

Get your child involved in the packing. Let him/her decide which toy to bring along. Explain to him/her the purpose of items packed so that he/she has some idea what to expect at the destination. For eg., let him/her know that you are packing a bottle of sunblock because you are bringing him/her to a sunny place.

11. Ample time before flight

Let your child have a great time playing at the airport. Build in sufficient allowance and give him/her time to run around. The child might be stressed out if you are rushing for time.

Bring only what is necessary on board. [Pic]

10. Don't bring too much

Unless you are flying in style via the first/business class, do expect the economy class cabin to be squeezy. Bring what is necessary on board and don't carry loads of stuff as if you are migrating. You should be paying more attention to your child and not the luggage.

9. Airport security

The clearing process can be intimidating to young children. Take time to explain to your child the purpose and that the security personnel are not there to harm anyone. This is especially important to first time young travelers. You do not want to create a scene when he/she refuses to let teddy bear go through the scanner.

Explain to junior that teddy bear has
to go through security checks. [Pic]

8. Boarding

Most airlines allow passengers traveling with young children to board first. This makes a lot of sense. However, your kid may feel uneasy watching the crowd looking for their seats and stowing their luggage above their heads.

Boarding first is not necessarily a good idea. You might want to be the last instead. Let the rest settle down and you board just in time. Your child does not need to start his/her journey gawking at the chaos before taxiing.

7. Stroller, to bring or not to bring?

It depends. If your holiday involves some traveling on foot, do not expect junior to keep up. However, if you are just going to hop in and out of your rented car, a stroller might not be necessary.

If you are bringing a stroller, have it folded and placed at the end of the jet-way before boarding. You will pick it up from the 'same place' at your destination. Don't forget to tag it.

Suckling some candies can help to reduce
pressure in the ears. [Pic]

6. Food

Your child may not like airline food (who does?). Young children are less compromising when they are hungry. Bring along some handy snacks and let your child have access to their favorite food at all times.

It would be a good idea feeding them at the airport before the start of the journey. Get him/her some lollipops to suckle during take off and landing. That might help reduce the pressure in his/her ears.

Be sure to check the custom regulations before bringing any food items across the border.

5. Give some assignments

If your child is old enough, assign some tasks to keep him/her occupied during the flight. Let him/her have a drawing pad or a jotter book. He/she may draw or write about what he/she likes to see during the holidays. Nowadays, with gadgets such as iPad, your little one can have endless ways to be kept entertained.

Bring suitable gadgets to keep your
child occupied. [Pic]

4. Stay hydrated

The air in the cabin can get very dry. Let your child take frequent sips of water during his waking hours. Some lotion for dry skin would come in handy too. Occasionally, wet his/her nostrils with your wet finger. A child with irritated nostrils will not be in a good mood.

3. Sleep during flight

This would be ideal. If it is within your control, plan your child's nap time such that it largely coincides with the flight time.

Keep the little one hydrated
throughout the flight. [Pic]

2. Medication

If you are planning to get some medication for your child to ease motion sickness or aid sleeping, consult your doctor first.

1. Watch your own behavior

Little children are very sensitive. They can be become apprehensive and cautious in a new environment. Your child will look to you for assurance. If you are flustered, worried or frustrated, your child will not feel any better.

Your mood can affect your
child's behavior. [Pic]

So remember, just relax and make the best out of any situation.

A holiday is not supposed to be stressful. Think through it, plan ahead, adjust along the way and always be prepared to abandon your plan.

Have a great trip!

"You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance." (Franklin P. Jones)

It's Time to Chill Out, Not Stress Out

2011-12-26T00:30:00.003+08:00

Learn to avoid holiday blues. [Pic]

Tis the season to be jolly...no, wait, not quite.

Ironically, during this festive season, most people experience very high stress level. The reasons are aplenty. Here are a few common experiences and some of these may have hit your stress button:

Rushed - You are running out of time and you work feverishly to clear your work before your year end break.
Cash trapped - You have a long shopping list and you feel the strain on your wallet.
Lonely - The sight of family reunion, friends get-together or loving couples sparks a bout of loneliness in you.
Irritable - With all the hustle and bustle around you, you begin to feel an overdose of jingle bells and Santa Claus.
Brain drained - You run out of gift ideas but refuse to settle for the cliche.
Resentful - It's never your cup of tea to socialize and celebrate. You don't understand and resent all the excitement around you.

Life is not stree-free but you can do with less. [Pic]

There you go, you are stressed out and may have some of these stress symptoms. While life is never stress-free, you cannot afford to leave it uncontrolled.

There are many ways to eliminate stress and they are not new to you. Let me put some of those together and hopefully the list is a timely reminder at this time of the year. Revisit it whenever you need a nudge.

Understand what stresses you. [Pic]

9. Know your stressor

If you do not know what bothers you, you do not know how to respond. Spend some 10 minutes to think about how you feel and why you feel that way.

8. Check your commitments

List your commitments and consider how each of them add on to your stress level. Sort them in a descending order and delete from the top of the list.

7. Have a 'do it now' habit

Very often 'later' becomes 'never'. The more you allow your 'to-do' list to grow, the more you feel stressed. Read more in "Procrastination is Best Left Till Tomorrow".

Multitasking can be stressful and unproductive. [Pic]

6. Learn to single-task

If you have been duped to believe that multitasking is the way to raise productivity, think again. You might be one of the many victims who are so stressed out juggling from task to task at the same time. See "So Clever ! You Can Multitask !" and "Farewell to Multitasking".

5. Motivate yourself

Stop blaming others for the lack of motivation. Let's face it, it would have to come from you. See "Get Your Daily Motivation" and "How to Kill Your Motivation?".

4. Balance your calories account

How much must you eat and how much exercise do you need? I don't know! All I know is that you never take in more calories than you burn. I will leave it to the experts to give you tips on exercise and healthy diets.

Take time to feel grateful. [Pic]

3. Be grateful

Appreciating what you have gives you instant richness. Sometimes, you just need to remind yourself how much more you have compared to millions others and how good you are and can be. See "Sometimes, I Forget..." and "You Are in a Top Ten List".

2. Choose happiness

That's right, choose, not pursue. The thing about happiness is that it is always with you. If you want to be happy, just be. See "Happiness is a Choice" and "Happiness Quotient".

1. Quit your job

Hang on and don't jump in yet. I do not want to be responsible for a workplace exodus anywhere. This is an option albeit a drastic one but do it with your eyes open. See "To Quit or Not to Quit?" and you may not have to quit after all.

Stressed spelled backwards is desserts. [Pic]

Our body is built to feel stress when danger is sensed. The Adrenaline rushes make our body works efficiently and it is important for a 'fight-or-flight' situation. However, when stress is sustained, our body will protest over time.

Take control of your life and manage your stress level. The colors of Christmas are red and green. Not blue.

"The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another." (William James)

The Amazing Jelly Beans

2011-12-05T01:50:00.003+08:00

Jelly bean colors and flavors - Endless possibilities [Source: Wiki]

I am fascinated with Jelly beans. Or should I say, with their colorfulness?

Jelly beans are a type of bean-shaped candy with a jellylike center and a firm sugar coating. Honestly, I don't really like how they taste but when they come in loads, it is definitely a feast to my eyes.

Colorful and flavorful

No one knows the exact date of their birth but these colorful beans have been around for a long time. The first jellybean was created by an unknown American candy maker in the 1800s. An 1861 advertisement recommended sending jelly beans to soldiers fighting in the Civil War.

From the 1970s, jelly beans were not only multi-colored but multi-flavored. Just take a look at Jelly Belly's Official 50 Flavors Guide and you will be amazed by the choices available. Too boring? Try "Tropical Mix" flavors or "Cocktail" flavors.

Exotic or simply bad taste? [Source]

Jelly bean in the wizard world

In "Harry Potter", the novel and movie, 'Bertie Bott's Every-Flavour Beans' encompasses any flavor you can imagine, including puke-inducing ear-wax flavor. Check out the full list of flavors.

The jelly bean President

The 40th U.S. President (1981-1989), Ronald Reagan's favorite candy was jelly beans. He began eating jelly beans in the 1960s when he gave up smoking and kept up the habit ever since.

He kept a crystal jar full of jelly beans in the Oval Office and often offered them during Cabinet meetings. He once said, "You can tell a lot about a fella's character by whether he picks out all of one color or just grabs a handful."

'Jelly bean portrait' of Ginger [Source]

Jelly bean art

President Reagan even has his own portrait made of 10,000 jelly beans. It is displayed in the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in Simi Valley, California.

If you do not have any jelly bean, you can create your own 'jelly bean portrait' digitally. I had it done for our pet cat. Try making one with your own photo.

Check out more jelly bean art collections.

What can you do with 288,000 jelly beans?

Jelly bean MTV

What can you do with 288,000 jelly beans?

It took 30 people, 1,357 hours over a period of 22 months, lots of dedication and creativity to produce a 'Jelly bean' MTV. They worked with singer Kina Grannis and 288,000 beans for the MTV "In Your Arms" (Watch MTV).

Catch the making of 'In Your Arms' as well.

Jelly bean and technology

The popular Android operation system was first released in Sep 2008. Since then, many updates have been added on. From Apr 2009, each version was codenamed based on dessert items in alphabetical order. Starting from Cupcake, we have Donut, Eclair, Froyo, Gingerbread, Honeycomb and the latest Ice Cream Sandwich.

There have been some unconfirmed suggestions that coming up next would be, yes, what else? Jelly bean! Time will tell if this is true. (see article)

What comes after 'Ice Cream Sandwich'? 'Jelly bean'?

Celebrating 'Jelly Bean Day'

22 April every year is the 'Jelly bean Day'. I have no idea why that is so. To me, everyday is 'Jelly Bean Day'.

Jelly bean quiz

Let's take a leisurely closure to this sweet and colorful story by taking a quiz. Find out "Which Jelly Belly Bean Flavor Suits Your Personality?". Just for fun. Don't take it too seriously.

"The colorfulness of your life can be tainted by your monochrome mind." (Vanilla Lenscape)

Hello Kitties!

2011-11-21T00:30:00.001+08:00

"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat."
(Ellen Perry Berkeley) [Pic]

This post is for all the cat lovers, cat haters and everyone who wants to know a little more about our feline friends.

Felis catus or felis domesticus, is what domestic cats are known scientifically. To most of us, they are simply 'cats' or 'kitties'. Today, they are arguably the most popular pet in the world. (Dog lovers, chill!)

"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshiped as gods.
Cats have never forgotten this.
(Anonymous) [Pic]

Cats and history

Cats have been featured in human lives for thousands of years. Their history as human pets can be traced as far back as the Ancient Egyptian era. The word for cat in Ancient Egypt was "mau". This sounds similar to the universally known word of "meow".

Cats 'meow' internationally. [Pic]

Cats in various languages

Besides "meow", cat is interestingly known by very similar names around the world. It is "gatto" in Italian and "gato" in Portuguese. The Vietnamese say "meo" and the Chinese say "mao"(猫). In Dutch, different names are given for male cats (kat) and female cats (poes). (See 'cat' in other languages)

Cats can be taboo. [Pic]

Cats as symbols

In many cultures and folklores, black cats are seen as a symbol of evil omens. This is the main reason why black cats have a lower chance of being adopted from shelters. In Thailand, the Korat cat is seen as a symbol of good luck. In Japan, the Maneki Neko is believed to bring 'fortune'.

Cats can be scary. [Pic]

Cats as a phobia

Ailurophobia is a form of persistent, irrational fear of cats. Similar terms include felinophobia, elurophobia and gatophobia. Just like other forms of phobia, it is likely to be developed by earlier bad experiences.

Cats can be funny. [Source]

Kats R Funny

Apart from their usual regal and aloof image, cats are often being picked as elements of humor. You can find lots of cat jokes in the Internet. "I Can Has Cheezburger?" weblog featuring lolcats is probably one of the most visited feline sites.

Puss in Boots: Endless cat wits.
[Source]

Cats as fictional characters

The recently released 'Puss in Boots (3D)' movie (watch trailer) has received largely positive reviews. The combo of feline and wits is just purrfect.

That is but just one. There are countless other popular fictional characters featuring cats: Figaro in Pinocchio, Dinah in 'Alice in Wonderland', Garfield in 'Garfield the Movie', Lucifer in 'Cinderella', Doraemon from the Japanese animation, Hello Kitty from Japan, Tom in 'Tom and Jerry' and Aristocats, the Disney movie are just some examples.

Oreo: Our house pet [Pic]

Cats as pets

A pet is for life and it is the same with having a pet cat. There are pros and cons and it is important that you do not introduce one into your life on impulse. Where possible, adopt. (See "A Pet is for Life")

Maru: A famous Internet Star [Source]

Cats as Internet Stars

Maru is a male Scottish Fold in Japan. His videos on YouTube have received millions of hits. He is known to love boxes and here is one of his videos. Check out others. You will love them.

Nora is a gray tabby cat adopted from the shelter in New Jersey. She has become famous for 'playing the piano'. Watch her play on the keyboard in this video.

In Singapore, Duke is a cat loved by many fans here and abroad. He was once a stray but now lives in an office. He has been a voice for other strays and has helped raise funds and awareness. Duke is taken care of by 'Minion' and his fans are known as 'dukakis'. (Read news and blog)

Cat quiz

Finally, give yourself a simple test and find out how much you know about cats. (I barely pass).

"People that don't like cats haven't met the right one yet." (Deborah A. Edwards, D.V.M.)

Don't be a People Pleaser

2011-11-14T00:30:00.009+08:00

People-pleasers want to make others happy at all costs.
Don't be one. [Pic]

Do you find yourself agreeing to things you really do not want to do? Do you have difficulties saying 'No' to others? Do you feel uncomfortable about what others do or say to you but choose to say nothing?

Your answers to the above questions give you a quick idea if you are having issues with personal boundaries. A simple test can tell you more.

Healthy personal boundaries lead to
healthy personal relationship [Pic]

What are Personal Boundaries?

Personal boundaries are the physical, emotional and mental limits we set to protect ourselves from being manipulated or violated by others.

These limits, once communicated, serve as guidance on how others may act or speak in your presence.

What they are not?

Setting personal boundary may be mistaken as a negative behavior. It is seen as going against values such as selflessness and personal sacrifice.

Get those ideas out of your head!

On the contrary, it is a responsible act to have healthy personal boundaries. It is necessary as a prerequisite for harmonious and sustainable people relationship.

If you don't say, they don't know. [Pic]

Why are Personal Boundaries important?

Setting clear personal boundaries helps to establish healthy mutual respect and maintain good relationship. It is a win-win approach.

A healthy set of personal boundary boost self-esteem and happiness. It also helps us take greater control of our lives as we move on to meet the endless stream of life changes.

See "Boost Your Self Esteem: You're Better than You Think You Are"

How to set Personal Boundaries?

4. Know your rights

Before anything else, you must believe that it is your right to set personal boundaries. Be honest with yourself on how you feel and what you think. Always have your own opinion while remaining humble and respectful towards alternative views.

You do not owe others more favor than others owe you.

Enforce your boundary. Say 'No'. [Pic]

3. Learn to say 'No'

If you are a people-pleaser, you may find yourself constantly agreeing to requests and advances. If you habitually accommodate others, you find your own happiness index dipping.

I am not promoting a selfish behavior. Rather, you need to remember that if you do not take care of your own needs, you won't be well enough to serve those who deserve your time.

We all know this too well: A frustrated mom is far less than a great mom.

Learn to say 'No' without fear, guilt and anger.

2. Know that you are important

You need to constantly remind yourself that your own feelings and needs are at no time less important. This reminder is especially relevant to women who behold traditional values of self-sacrifice.

Respect yourself and develop a strong sense of identity. Do believe in shared responsibility and reciprocity in any relationship.

You have to say where your boundary is. [Pic]

1. Learn to communicate your boundary

If someone crosses the line and makes you uncomfortable, you need to let him know. Keeping silence will send the signal that it is not inappropriate to behave in that manner.

There is no need to defend or argue. Simply communicate directly and gracefully while staying firm and assertive. Repeat yourself when faced with resistance or persistence.

Remember, once you give in, you are encouraging others to ignore your needs.

You OK, they OK

You are unique and have your own ideals. Take personal responsibility for who you are and be in charge of your own life.

When you are well and good, you are ready to serve, with personal boundaries intact, of course.

Don't play victim. You are not one.

"The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others." (Sonya Friedman)

How to Meet People, Anytime and Anywhere

2011-11-07T00:30:00.051+08:00

How to meet people:
One of the most important skills you ever need. [Pic]

When we were little, adults would caution us not to talk to strangers. Are you still lugging that baggage and have problems meeting people?

We grew up carrying with us a certain level of apprehension towards approaching a total stranger or people we know little about. Some of us moved on and learn to meet new people but others need some help.

The skill of knowing how to meet people can impact the quality of your social life and the bottom-line of your business. It is not effortless and neither is it beyond reach. With some practice, you can meet people anytime and anywhere.

Here are some ways to meet people. Give them a try and find out what works for you:

Make the first move proactively. [Pic]

12 Have a proactive attitude

This is one of the key success ingredients in meeting people. You are responsible for your own social life and you would need to work on it. From now on, take note of your meeting encounters and check who usually makes the first move.

11 Build up self-confidence

Self-confidence is the result of self-perception. They way you interpret information received from feedback and body language will affect the level of your self confidence.

See "Boost Your Self Esteem: You're Better than You Think You Are"

10 Handle the fear of rejection

The fear of rejection is worse than the rejection itself. It is usually a show-stopper. Before you make your first move, remind yourself that you have nothing to lose. So what if there is no reciprocity for your initial 'Hi"? Take some risk and don't anticipate rejection.

Small talks need not be superficial and boring. [Pic]

9 Learn to make small talks

Some say small talks are superficial and boring. I prefer to describe them as light and harmless. Before you can plunge deeper into any relationship, you ought to begin from the shallow end. When making small talks, give everyone an equal chance to say something.

8 Get ready something to offer

This is a good leverage to approach other people. If you are good at something, you can offer some advice. If you bake, you can offer a little treat. Caution: I said 'offer', not 'impose'.

7 Prepare self introduction

It may seem easy talking about yourself but some preparation is recommended. Some of us tend to talk too much about self and others prefer to preserve total privacy. Be mentally prepared on what you want to say about yourself. You need not disclose everything but stay truthful in what you say.

Be prepared to offer something. [Pic]

6 Be a good conversationalist

Prolonged silence can be creepily awkward. A good conversationalist keeps things flowing and yet avoids being too domineering.

See "Are You A Good Conversationalist?"

5 Respect boundaries

We are talking about initial meetings with people who are total strangers or with little familiarity. You ought to observe some social norms and stick to the acceptable boundaries. For example, extended eye contact, excessive physical closeness and imposing personal questions are big no-no's.

4 Be interested

Have some curiosity and find out more about the people you meet. It is a thin line between being interested in a person and being intrusive. If you do not practice, you can't get better at gauging it.

You need not be a Mr. Know-It-All.
Some sensing of what is going on helps. [Pic]

3 Be informed

It can be embarrassing not knowing what is being said most of the time, especially when you are the only odd ball around. Do keep abreast of current affairs and issues that affect us.

2 Be receptive

Others may hold a different view, which may seem radical to you. While you need not agree to that, there is no justification to start an argument, however mild it might seem. If it gets too uncomfortable, you can always switch to other conversation topics.

1 Learn to read body language

The problem with body language reading is not the lack of expertise. Sometimes, we may be too self-absorbed that we fail to observe what others are telling us through body language. Do pay attention and take the cue to respond appropriately.

You can meet people anytime, anywhere. [Pic]

Where to meet people?

Anywhere!

Classes, social events, public places, workplace, interest groups and volunteer works are just some avenues. I am talking about meeting real people, not those over the Internet. So, you would need to get out of your seat and start walking towards someone.

If you plan to read up more, try these:

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships by Leil Lowndes

"The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right place but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment." (Dorothy Nevill)

10 Life Lessons from Dad

2011-10-31T00:30:00.026+08:00

p [Pic]

Everyone teaches me something. That includes my dad, of course.

Dad was a traditional man, soft-spoken with occasional bursts of temper. Most of his advices were not handed to me through direct words. I was sure they were there but I had to decode them. Some of the decoding took awhile, after I earned some wisdom with my years.

He seldom gave straightforward advice such as "You ought to study harder...". Come to think of it, he had never directly acknowledged my academic achievement of any kind. It was as if it would have been too arrogant to do so.

His rare advices in words were cryptic, like "That is not the way". I usually took the heed and tried some other ways to do the same.

Over the years, I realized that he has taught me much, in his own unique ways. Here are some:

Embrace 'now' before it becomes the past. [Pic]

Lesson 1: Everyday is worth celebrating

My dad was never too impressed with special celebrations such as birthdays. To him, 'Everyday in our life exists only once'.

That is so true. Special occasions are indeed special for some reasons. But 'today' will never revisit.

I learnt to embrace 'now'.

Lesson 2: Read widely and wisely

My dad read widely and as a child, I admired his wealth of knowledge. We would discuss anything from history to entertainment.

I remember bringing home a children magazine which was popular among the kids back then. In his usual nonchalant manner, my dad simply said, "It won't teach you much". Since then, I gave little attention to that magazine.

I learnt that some books are worth more than others. Always read something worthy.

Learn to see possibilities.
Not obstacles. [Pic]

Lesson 3: Be observant and see beyond the surface

Occasionally, I followed my dad on his work trips. I would wait patiently while he attended to his business. I knew that some 'mini tours' around the town were next on our agenda.

My dad was not a typical 'tour guide'. He would show me sights that were often overlooked. Once he showed me some barnacles along the river bank and said "They are there all the time but you can only see them during low tides".

Many things are always there but it is really up to us to 'see' them. Very often, we look but we don't see. (read "You Look But You Don't See?")

I learnt to look for 'barnacles' around me.

Lesson 4: Walk into the alleys of life

When I traveled with dad, we walked a lot. It was a good way to feel the place and be close to him. He usually would not stick to the main road and I found myself weaving through alleys and lanes.

I did not like that but I must admit that I was pleasantly surprised by many unusual sights. I would not have seen them on conventional routes.

I learnt to try new 'routes' in life and welcome surprises.

The alleys of life are full of surprises.
Explore them. [Pic]

Lesson 5: Everything has its good side

As a child, I hated my neighbor's dog, Napoleon. He was unfriendly and often terrified me with his hostile approaches. Just to clarify, I loved dogs and I still do. I just did not like Napoleon.

One day, on our way home, my dad brought my attention to a street sign. Sitting there was my most hated dog in his most unusual serene manner. Dad said Napoleon was a faithful dog and would habitually wait for the return of his owner at that time of the day.

Sometimes, we can get so caught up with our initial ideas about a person or something. We forget to see what could be good as well.

I learnt to see the good in people (and dogs too, of course).

Lesson 6: Earn your respect

We lived in a small town and my dad knew many town folks. I could see the respect they gave him and I could see why.

My dad was one of the most unassuming men I know. He was humble even though I knew he was superior to many in numerous ways. He earned his respect through his contributions, not status.

I learnt to earn the respect of others too.

No one owes you a living.
You decide how you live your life. [Pic]

Lesson 7: Don't indulge in negative emotions

My dad was not the most patient man I know. I have seen how he would burst into flames and cause everyone around to be uncomfortable. I did not fully understand why but I am sure he had his reasons.

When we lose our cool, we always find our actions well justified. We give little thoughts to how unhelpful our actions might be. More often than not, some damage is caused.

I learnt that others do not owe me a living and I have no privilege to impose my foul emotions on them.

Lesson 8: Dirty your hands

When I was in Primary (Junior) School, I used to ask dad questions found in my science text books. He would suggest, "Try it out!"

I remember he helped me magnetize a metal pin and we saw how it worked like a compass.

I learnt that life is a lab. I need to do some experiments to learn in it.

Life is like a lab.
Do some experiments in it. [Pic]

Lesson 9: Parental advice isn’t always correct.

To be fair, my dad did not know everything. He taught me what he knew but he might miss the point.

He had a certain way of learning a language and he believed that was good for me too. I was not gaining much mileage under his guidance.

We have different learning styles and I learnt not to copy learning approaches from others blindly.

Lesson 10: Don't hold back

We were saddened by dad's untimely demise. I have always wondered what more he could teach me if he had been around awhile longer.

The answers will never be known.

I learnt that life is short. So say what you want to say and do what you want to do, now.

Everyday is the right day to celebrate. [Pic]

Today is not Father's Day and why am I writing this? Just like what I have learnt from Dad, everyday is worth celebrating. Don't wait till the next Father's Day to celebrate who your father is, or was.

You might want to read up more dad blogs.

"Sometimes the poorest man leaves his children the richest inheritance." ~Ruth E. Renkel~

What Happened to Your New Year Resolution?

2011-10-24T00:30:00.003+08:00

2011 is ending in about 70 days.
Have you made good your new year resolution? [Pic]

Before the start of this year, I shared My New Year Resolution.

Many of you would have made new year resolutions at that time too. In fact, you may have done so year after year. Right now, we have about 70 more days to the end of 2011. Have you made good what you have set out to do yet?

Hang on a moment, I think I heard some people saying "What was my resolution again?".

One of the most common reasons for failure
is the failure to plan. [Pic]

Most do not meet their goals

If you have forgotten about your resolution or eventually fail to meet your goals, you are not alone. Experts say that new year resolutions are doomed to failure and 78% would have failed in their plans.

One of the most common reasons for failure is the failure to plan.

Many new year resolutions are ambitious but simplistic. They lack execution plans and do not spell any start or end point. For example, if you shouted out loud on January 1st 2011 that you wanted to quit smoking, you were not making a plan. You were merely making a wish.

You need real discipline to make
good your resolutions. [Pic]

Is your resolution a mere cliché?

Take a look at a top-ten new year resolution list. Usually, you will find personal health and wellness on the list. Many people make these new year resolutions year after year. It makes us wonder why they would ceremoniously make the same one without realizing that they have been missing it for years.

You need discipline, not mood swings

To make good your resolution, you need discipline, real discipline. Winners take discipline as a tool to guide their performance. However, most people see it as a chore, a painful chore.

The bad news is that discipline can be painful. However, the good news is, you can practice so that the pain lessens or goes away.

See Choose Your Pain: Discipline or Regret

What you think is what you get. [Pic]

Your thoughts drive your actions

What you do is a result of what you think. If you think negatively and always gravitate towards the downside of things, you will find yourself there most of the time.

In order to shape a positive mindsets, you would have to learn to do positive self-dialog. Each time you talk to yourself, you are in fact asking and answering a series of questions. The questions you ask and the answers you give go into your brain in a similar way how a programmer puts computing rules in a computer. Your actions and behaviors depend on how you have been programmed.

Say "I am doomed to fail" repeatedly, you would. Say "I am sure I will overcome it", you would too.

See Self Dialog: Look Who's Talking?

Get back on track each time you
derail. There will be obstacles [Pic]

Be honest with yourself

Let's face it, making a resolution does not magically make you lose 5 kgs. You would have to work on it. While doing so, you may constantly face difficulties and distractions. While I have suggested working on your discipline, I did not say you have to drive yourself up the wall.

Do expect to derail along the way. What is important is to come back on track. Set your mind to your end point and keep going. Sprinting may give you a good speed but you will lose steam before you get far. Taking consistent small steps can be more powerful.

See The Power of Small Steps.

The journey of change continues. [Pic]

The last lap

You have 70 more days to the end of the year. It is never too late to start working on what you have set out to do.

70 days is not enough? Who says you can't have more?

Your plan need not be compartmentalized by artificial time line. If it is more realistic to have more than 70 days, give yourself that. Start working on it today. Since when you always have to start on January 1st and complete by December 31st? Time is seamless.

My new year resolution was to have none. What I really meant was I will make a commitment to change whenever and wherever, not just at the start of the year.

Forgotten your resolution? Fret not, you can generate new ones. Nay, just kidding.

"Work is hard. Distractions are plentiful. And time is short." ~Adam Hochschild~

Picture Blog #24 : A Thought A Day (Part 2)

2011-10-17T00:30:00.017+08:00

You are who you think you are. Think like a victor, not a victim.

I shared A Thought A Day (Part 1) earlier this year. Since then, 238 days have gone by and 238 daily thoughts have been gathered.

It is believed that we have about 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts on an average day and many of them are negative. If left unmanaged, they would shape negative habits and reduce our quality of life.

We need to be aware of our thoughts. While we can't rid all negative thoughts, we can have many more positive ones to influence our predominant mindset.

In this Picture Blog, I am merely putting down a tiny speck of what might have gone through my mind. Nothing is very new but it is always good to remind ourselves of the simplest and yet most often forgotten ideas.

I shall leave you with this quote and a collection of my daily thoughts taken from Vanilla Lenscape.

"Your beliefs become your thoughts. Your thoughts become your words. Your words become your actions. Your actions become your habits. Your habits become your values. Your values become your destiny." ~Mahatma Gandhi~

Don’t be afraid to lose before you win.

The biggest mistake is to see a mistake as a mistake.

Accept that you are not perfect. Do your best nonetheless.

If you can’t do great things, do small ones with a great difference.

Falling down is a given. Getting up or staying there is a choice.

Would you rather take the pain of discipline or the pain of regret?

In this age of information, you have no excuse to be ignorant.

Everyone deserves a chance to be free.

You don’t have to the THE best. You just have to be at YOUR best.

If you wait till everything’s right before you do your best, then you are not doing your best.

Kind words cost nothing. Yet, they are priceless.

Life’s like that: By the time you’re old &d wise enough to focus on the right thing.

The winners in life are those who think they can.

We become what we think and believe.

A lifelong learner never takes a break.

Focusing in simple things in life can be liberating.

Nothing is more ignorant than choosing not to know what you don’t know.

No one in this world can do a better job of being you than you.

Negative thinking makes you tired.

Don’t just wish that you have something. You need to act.

Every tiny step forward is a worthwhile action.

Your presence is a present to the world. Don’t forget to unwrap it.

When angry, take a deep breath.

For each failure you encounter, you are one step closer to success.

Everyone looks. Few see.

Don’t use a lot when a little will do.

How much you think you have depends on how much you think you need.

Life is an opportunity. Capture it.

You talk because you have something to say or you have to say something?

Spend some time alone every day.

Don’t wait till the light goes out.

You are in charge of your attitude.

Stop bitching around. Life is what we make of it.

Sometimes, I suddenly understand something I’ve understood all my life but in a new way.

Images taken from: Vanilla's Gallery

Picture Blog #23: Wise Words

2011-10-03T00:30:00.006+08:00

[Pic]

Words of wisdom can make you wiser, if you use them wisely.

I learnt that everyday, an average person has about 60,000 thoughts. Only a small part of these thoughts are shared. Most of them dissipate and are never known ever again.

Quotable quotes are documented words taken from usually fairly well-known people. They are used to inspire, to teach and to remind.

On an average, about 80% of our thoughts are negative. It is therefore not surprising that some quotable quotes are not as encouraging. Some are even depressing and misleading. We would have to use quotable quotes carefully and within appropriate context.

Here are some of my favorite quotes. I hope some may find you at the right moment and give you a dose of much needed motivation.

[Pic]

"Quotes are nothing but inspiration for the uninspired." ~Richard Kemph~

Choose Your Pain: Discipline or Regret

2011-09-26T00:30:00.005+08:00

Self-discipline involves acting according to what you
think instead of how you feel in the moment. [Pic]

I lack self-discipline. Many out there share my pain.

There were countless times I intended do something I knew was good for me. Somehow, I gave in to my moods and how I 'felt'. At times, I garnered enough will power to hit the road but halted after a short while.

We all have such experiences. Don't we?

What is Self Discipline?

Self discipline involves acting based on how you think rather than how you feel. It usually comes with some momentary discomfort or pain.

There are many different but similar ways to define 'self-discipline'. The one from Wikipedia defines it as "the ability to motivate oneself in spite of a negative emotional state."

Steve Pavlina attributes the five pillars of self-discipline to "Acceptance, Willpower, Hard Work, Industry, and Persistence." (See 'Self-Discipline' by Steve Pavlina)

Self discipline requires the inner strength to
reject immediate satisfaction. [Pic]

What is Self Discipline to me?

I look around for ways to 'cure' my lack of discipline. I come across so many suggestions to the point they become rather confusing. I thought I just have to give it my own meaning.

'Self-discipline' is about the mental strength that gets you to do what you need to do. Many call that strength 'will power' but I look at it as 'thinking muscle'. Just like any muscle, you can also build up your 'thinking muscle'.

'Self-discipline' is also about a collection of good habits. These habits get you to do what is good for you. You too can build such habits.

Build up your 'thinking muscle' to overcome the
desire to indulge in unhelpful habits. [Pic]

Within this simplistic meaning of 'self discipline', I have a few related thoughts:

1) You can choose your behaviors

First and foremost, you have to believe that you have the choice. It is never about what is around you or who is getting in the way. You decide on the set of behaviors you think is helpful to achieve your goals.

For example, when you are confronted by a hostile person, you have the choice of walking away or play 'tit for tat'.

2) Habits can be built

Having decided on your choice behavior, make it a habit.

A habit is a repetitive and unconscious act. For example, if it is your habit to clean up your work desk everyday, you would do it without much struggle with your moods. You would just keep tidying up your desk whenever the need arises and you don't give much thought to it.

On the contrary, if that has not become your habit, you would have to rationalize the need to do it and might constantly find reasons to lower its priority. During this time, your desk stays messy.

You need to take control of the internal world of
yourself before you can take control of the
external world. [Pic]

3) Do 'exercises' to rid reluctance

When you lack self-discipline, you constantly experience a sense of reluctance which prevents you from doing what you set out to do. You need to strengthen your will power or 'thinking muscle' to rid your reluctance. Some simple exercises can help you achieve that.

The exercises can take place anytime and anywhere. Whenever you are about to take the easy way out, grab that as your chance to practice.

Here are some examples:

You are about to buy something on impulse, fight that desire.
You are about to put the second sugar cube into your coffee, hold it.
You are about to walk away from someone you dislike, say 'Hi' to him.
You are about to sit in front of the TV, take a walk.

Such exercises would gradually strengthen your will power. In turn, you get a more disciplined self.

You can exercise your 'thinking muscle'
anytime, anywhere. [Pic]

Putting it into practice

I write regularly and I enjoy organizing my thoughts in words. However, there were times I experienced great reluctance to write because I 'felt' like doing something else. I did not allow that to happen and my writing did not cease.

That is but one of my practices. You can find yours and start practicing. 'You are better than you think you are'. Just take the first step and keep going. Let the 'Power of Small Steps' take you to where you want to go.

Surely you would agree that it is better to take the pain of discipline than the pain of regret.

"The undisciplined are slaves to moods, appetites and passions." ~ Stephen R. Covey~

Picture Blog #22: Dalí - Mind of a Genius

2011-09-19T00:30:00.025+08:00

'Dance of Time II', at the entrance of the Museum. [Pic]

A genius is in town but not for too long.

"Dalí: Mind of a Genius – The Exhibition" opens at the Marina Bay Sands ArtScience Museum, Singapore, on 14 May 2011. You have up to 30 Oct 2011 if you have yet to catch it.

Dalí: Mind of a Genius Exhibition,
14 May 11 - 30 Oct 11
Source: Marina Bay Sands

The Spanish artist, whose full name is Salvador Domènec Felip Jacint Dalí i Domènech, Marquis de Púbol is usually just known as Salvador Dalí (thank goodness). He was born in Spain in 1904 and died at the age of 84 in 1989. During his life time, his creations spanned across various media. His field is expansive covering paintings, sculptures, photography, films, writings and even furniture designs.

To a lay person like me, Dali appears to be an eccentric artist. To others who have since admired his ingenious works, he is well regarded as a surrealist. Very briefly, a surrealist is an artist who is a member of the surrealism movement. I know that does not really explain very much. After all, I have to respect that a surrealist is surreal and it is not something I can grapple with easily.

The Persistence of Memory, 1931 (Source: Wikipedia)

Dali's most famous piece of work has to be "The Persistence of Memory" painted in 1931. The painting consists a surreal images of melting pocket watches which seem to straddle into the fourth dimension of time. This recognizable piece of artwork leaves you with limitless room for interpretation.

At the exhibition, be prepared to lose your mind in the imagination of Dali. There are three themes, bringing you through 'Femininity and Sensuality', 'Religion and Mythology', and 'Dreams and Fantasy'.

ArtScience Museum, Marina Bay Sands [Pic]

I did enjoy myself immersing in more than 250 pieces of his striking artworks. I would not say I understood or appreciated every single piece I saw. However, I was temporarily transcended into a surreal world which was most refreshing and intriguing.

I tried to go into the mind of Dali and wondered if he was sane. After all, he once said that:

"There is only one difference between a madman and me. The madman thinks he is sane. I know I am mad.”

However, he seemed to have contradicted himself when he said:

"The only difference between me and a madman is that I am not mad."

Only he knew better, or did he?

Here are some of the great stuff I saw when I visited the museum a few months ago.

Dance of Time I [Pic]

Melting Time [Pic]


Space Elephant [Pic]

Alice in Wonderland [Pic]

Melting Time [Pic]

Vision of the Angel [Pic]

Triumphant Angel [Pic]

Homage to Terpsichore [Pic]

Man with Butterfly [Pic]

Lady Godiva with Butterflies [Pic]

Homage to Fashion [Pic]

Space Venus [Pic]

Woman Aflame [Pic]

Horse Saddled with Time [Pic]

Saint George and the Dragon [Pic]

Unicorn [Pic]

Snail and the Angel [Pic]

Dali's Paintings [Pic]

The Mae West Lips Sofa [Pic]

Spellbound [Pic]

Image of Dali on a smoke screen [Pic]

CNA 5 Sep 11: ArtScience Museum offers complimentary programmes

Exhibition Brochure

Press Release

Ticketing Information

"Have no fear of perfection - you'll never reach it." ~Salvador Dali~

A Reflection: 10 Years After 911

2011-09-11T21:34:00.001+08:00

10 years on...will the world ever forgive and forget? [Pic]

Today is the 11th of September 2011, 10 years after the horrific incident which will take the world forever to forget.

On that fateful day, two hijacked planes crashed into the twin towers of the New York World Trade Center. Another crashed into the Pentagon, the headquarters of the US Defense. The forth one crashed in Pennsylvania.

All these four unforgettable tragedies took thousands of lives and they were no accidents nor coincidence. The planned acts were driven by seemingly insurmountable hatred among groups of human beings.

On the same day three years ago, I wrote "I Guess I'll Never Understand" and wondered why human hatred can be so extreme that nothing else seemed to matter. I am not any wiser today.

Human hatred can be so extreme that nothing else
seemed to matter.

Have we become worse?

In the beginning, the cavemen were preoccupied with physical survival. They hunted and they fought with animals. They became territorial and guarded their turfs. Back then, human beings fought and kill each other because they were protecting their families and food.

Over the last few millenia, men added more sophistication in their lives: language, religion, ethnic and culture. Lifestyle became more varied and beliefs became more complex. It is no longer just about food and shelter.

Today, we need more. At least, that is what most people think. In our hectic pursuit of what we think we need, we forget about some simple facts of life. We lose ourselves in materialism and become anemic in spirituality.

Are you losing yourselves in materialism and
becoming anemic in spirituality? [Pic]

On the anniversary of the painfully unforgettable day, let's spend a moment to take stock of ourselves.

Gratitude

We complain and we complain a lot. However, if we were to take a step back, we would realize that we have been complaining about things that we can do without and forget to be thankful for the richness that has already been given to us.

We forget that we were born healthy, we received education, we have three meals a day, we have clean water, we have jobs and we have our loved ones with us. The list does not stop here.

See "Sometimes, I Forget..." and learn to complete the sentence "I am thankful for.." everyday, starting from now.

Be thankful for the gifts and richness
bestowed upon you. [Pic]

Needs

We are constantly being lured by glitzy advertisements and busy 'keeping up with the Joneses'. We want more the moment we have more. The pursuit never ends and increasingly serves less purposes: A more powerful automobile is not going to bring you to office any sooner in the morning; a bigger house is not going to make your family much happier and a more sumptuous meal only means more wastage.

Do ponder over the notion 'The More The Merrier'.

Now

How much of your time is spent embracing 'Now'? Some people live in the past and feel sorry for things they can no longer change. Some people hope for a better tomorrow but do little to make that happen. Some people often forget that 'Now' is not here forever and there are only so many 'tomorrows'.

In 'The Last Lecture' I tried to imagine if we were to know our 'expiry date' right from the start of our lives, would we have lived our lives differently?' Would you?

Complete the sentence "I am thankful for..." everyday,
starting from now. [Pic]

Learning

We do not stop learning after leaving our last learning institution. No one disagrees with that but few truly understand and practice lifelong learning. We seem to have loads of reasons why we have no time to keep up. Some of which, I must say, are creative. In 'Lifelong Learning - My Way", I said that it is about making it a habit and making it a priority.

Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can - there will always come a time when you will be grateful you did.

Nature

We do not own the Earth and yet we behave like we have another one out there. If all the seven billion of us could be gentler to the Earth, this blue marble can certainly be happier. After all, it is the only thing we have in common.

See "The '350' Global Warming Alert", take a little interest on global warming and see "Say NO To Plastic Bags" and start doing something within your means, at least.

Not forgetting our animal friends. If you plan to keep one at home, do remember that "A Pet is for Life". Have some "(Cruel) Food For Thought" when you put what is left of them in your plates. Take a look at "(Cruel) Food For Thought #2" too.

We do not own the Earth. Do live harmoniously
with nature. [Pic]

Happiness

Everyone wants to be happy but many go the opposite way and make themselves miserable. How very odd. Is it really so difficult to be happy?

In "Happiness is a Choice", I wrote that we can become happier if we learn to tell apart what we can control and what we can't. It will definitely help if we always examine ourselves first before blaming anyone. In "Happiness Quotient", I reckoned that the secret for being a happy person is not that complex and we should not make it so.

Will time ever erase the pain in the past? [Pic]

So, 10 years on, with Bin Laden dead, has the world become more peaceful? I am not certain. What I am certain is that each of us owe ourselves the duty to make ourselves a better person. Make this your daily reminder: "Be a "Better Me" Everyday".

Finally, let's not forget those who died, those who were never found and those who were left behind on September 11, 2001, just because some individuals had forgotten to "Think "Better, Not "Bitter".

"If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there'd be peace." ~John Lennon~

It's Time for Moon-Gazing Party

2011-09-05T00:30:00.001+08:00

Waiting for the fullest and brightest moon on
the Mid Autumn Festival. [Pic]

In a week's time (12 Sep 2011), we will be celebrating the Mid Autumn Festival (中秋节).

According to the lunar calendar, this festival falls on the 15th day of the eighth month every year. It is not known when it began but some historians believe that it has its origin from a few thousands years ago. In those days, life evolved largely around agricultural activities. During the mid autumn, farmers would celebrate good harvests under the full moon in the eight month.

In the early days, the Chinese would worship the moon during the Mid Autumn Festival. Later, the tradition evolved to a more leisurely moon-gazing, wine-sipping and poem-reciting celebration. Many Chinese poems from the Tang and Song Dynasties include poetic appreciation of the moon.

Mid Autumn, a festival for moon-gazing,
wine-sipping and poem-reciting. [Pic]

When is the moon at its brightest?

The moon is said to be the fullest and the brightest during the mid autumn and there is even an ancient Chinese saying for it (月到中秋分外明). However, some may disagree and say that the brightest moon is found during the Winter Solstice (冬至).

In fact, in the last Winter Solstice (21 Dec 2010), we experienced a rare occurrence where the Winter Solstice coincided with lunar eclipse. On that day, the moon was said to be big, round and red, nothing we have seen since 1378.

Meteorologically, the moon is not necessarily the brightest during the Mid Autumn Festival. Earlier this year, we have just seen a Supermoon on 19 Mar 2011. On that day, the moon was said to be the nearest to the Earth in 18 years, making it the brightest, biggest and perhaps, the most threatening. Yes, threatening...

Is there any connection between natural
disasters and the moon? [Pic]

Should the moon be blamed for disasters?

Just a week before the Supermoon Day, Japan experienced one of the most powerful earthquake in history (11 Mar 2011). The quake has brought about the most monstrous tsunami that sent shock waves globally. Half a year later, Japan is still licking its wound inflicted by the nightmarish natural disaster.

Some people have speculated that the supermoon is responsible for natural disasters such as earthquakes. However, scientists have thought otherwise saying that there has been no evidence so far.

Is there a bunny up on the moon? [Pic]

What's up on the moon?

The moon must have ignited much imagination since time immemorial. According to folklore, Chang'e (嫦娥), the goddess of the Moon, lived up there with the Jade Rabbit. During full moon, take a good look at the moon and you might just spot the shape of the bunny in the dark shadows on the Moon.

Neil Armstrong, the first man on the moon, was there to check out on 20 Jul 1968. Ask him and he will tell you he saw no rabbit on that remarkable day.

The festival, today

In these modern days, we celebrate the Mid Autumn Festival contemporarily. In Singapore, the day is not one of the Public Holidays. Notwithstanding that, it would be difficult not to know that the festival is around the corner.

The businessmen would be at their top form, trying to lure you to buy their ever-most-creative mooncakes. They would stop at nothing to make their products eye-catching and attractive. This has drawn some criticism on ''unnecessary and wasteful mooncake packaging'.

Mooncake is the traditional sweet cookies during
the Mid Autumn Festival. [Pic]

The Mid Autumn Festival is also known as the 'Lantern Festival'. Decorations would feature lanterns in elaborate designs. The little ones are certainly more keen to carry their lanterns around the neighborhood than to taste some of the most exotic mooncakes. In nearby Malaysia, it has been reported that the Angry Birds lanterns are flying out of the stores fast.

Traditionally, Mid Autumn Festival celebration is preceded with presentation of mooncake as gifts to friends and relatives. However, in the eyes of the Chinese tax authorities, these are not ordinary gifts. Since 1994, employees who receive such gifts from their employers are to pay a 'mooncake tax' as part of their personal income tax for the benefits they enjoy. Needless to say, such a move has left a bitter taste in the mouths of the Chinese taxpayers. (See more Weird Tax Stories)

If you are in Singapore, you may want to check out Mid-Autumn Festival Street Light-Up, Street Bazaar, Mass Lantern Walk, Nightly Stage Shows in Chinatown or Lantern Festival at Chinese Garden.

There are hungry people elsewhere.
Go easy on food wastage. [Pic]

Spare a thought during the festive time

In "Where's The Bunny?" I wrote in 2008, I noted that "Everybody seems to be rushing to buy for everybody. The net result of this whole hullabaloo is the handsome profit netted by the merchants and loads of unconsumed mooncakes being transferred from those gleaming boxes to the least glamorous trash bins."

I doubt that things are any different this year. While you are in the mood to indulge in the sweet cookies, spare some thoughts for the hungry people in some other parts of the world. Go easy on food wastage!

Happy moon-gazing l!!

"In our daily lives, we must see that it is not happiness that makes us grateful, but the gratefulness that makes us happy." ~Albert Clarke~

The Power of Small Steps

2011-08-29T00:30:00.025+08:00

Taking a step each day will bring you 365 steps forward in a year. [Pic]

At any one time, you feel the need to change some parts of your life. Don't you?

Some of you tried to make drastic lifestyle changes and fell flat on the floor. Some of you tried to take small steps but halted along the way. But many simply felt stuck by your problems and circumstances.

Is making changes so difficult?

Before making any attempts to change your life, there are a few pitfalls you need to recognize:

4. Wish for a breakthrough

It is difficult to work towards a breakthrough in life. More often than not, a breakthrough comes incidentally along with other plans.

When one says 'I want to be a millionaire tomorrow', he is wishing for a breakthrough. He may have to win a lottery to get there. However, when one says, 'I want to be a millionaire before age 35', he may then plan to become one.

Wishing for a breakthrough is not the same as planning for a change.

You have many victorious moments everyday.
You just have to look out for them. [Pic]

3. Failure to recognize small victories

You have moments of victories everyday. However, you tend to let them pass without acknowledging, celebrating and rewarding yourself.

Small victories may not be earth-shaking but they are aplenty. Examples of victorious moments: You plan to get fit so you walk to the convenience store instead of driving; or you plan to reconnect with friends and you call an old friend instead of being buried in your busy routine.

Small victories won't bring you to your final destination. However, they encourage you along the way in this long race of change. Embrace them daily.

2. Fear for the unknown

This is a common phenomenon with human beings. You tend to resist meeting anything unfamiliar. This is one of the main reasons why making changes can be unpleasant.

Your fear lives in your imagination and so does your confidence. Change the way you think and you will change the way you feel. Visualize your success and let that fill your mind, leaving little or no space for fear.

1. Procrastination is a habit

This is a habit found in almost everyone. You know you ought to make some changes but most of the time you would say, 'that can wait'.

In "Procrastination is Best Left Till Tomorrow", I said "There is no panacea to curing procrastination. The most practical way to deal with it is to face it. However, you can choose to start small and gradually scale it up".

If you like to procrastinate, do it tomorrow.

Procrastination is best left till tomorrow. [Pic]

Let's go back to the earlier question "Is making changes so difficult?". To me, the answer is "No" if you do it consistently, taking small and manageable steps.

You may find the 'small-steps' approach unambitious. This is understandable because the journey is so long and taking small steps may mean taking forever.

However, if you compare this strategy to that of a runner, you would understand the power of small steps.

Sprinting is reserved for the 100-meter race. The journey of change is a long one. Just like a long-distance runner, you need to pace yourself. Look out for short-term 'finishing lines' and celebrate each milestone. If you use up all your energy in one burst, you are unlikely to go very far.

Feel the power of small steps. [Pic]

By taking small steps, you tend to reap benefits immediately:

You fear less
You tend not to procrastinate
You see regular interim results
You gain confidence with each step forward
You tend not to fall badly

In "Things You Can Do Better, Now", I shared that "it does not take much to make a difference, immediately". That is exactly what the 'small-steps' strategy is all about. Do all the things you can do immediately and see how little achievements accumulate and compound into respectable triumph.

Anthony Robbins, a renowned motivational speaker, wrote a book on "Giant Steps: Small Changes to Make a Big Difference". It comprises of 365 simple techniques to improve your life. Many of them are ideas which you have already known while you may need to pause and ponder over some other lessons.

I suggest you do not dismiss too quickly any of those lessons in the book as 'commonsense'. After all, in real life, 'commonsense is not so common'.

The simpler the idea is, the longer you
would need to ponder over it. [Pic]

In "Not-So-Common Sense?", I pointed out that many know what commonsense is but few are conscious in applying it. The simpler the idea is, the longer you would need to ponder over it.

Take your first baby step today, everyday, for the rest of your days. See how the power of small-steps launch you from height to height.

All the best to you on your journey of change.

"I dream of men who take the next step instead of worrying about the next thousand steps." ~Theodore Roosevelt~

Are You A Good Conversationalist?

2011-08-22T00:30:00.021+08:00

No one is an island. You need to hone the art of conversation. [Pic]

Even Robinson Crusoe finds the need to converse with someone. He has Friday.

We are gregarious creatures and we need to interact with others. However, not everyone finds holding a conversation easy. Some would rather avoid it as much as possible. Why?

Taken from Wikipedia, 'conversation' is explained as "interactive, more-or-less spontaneous, communication between two or more conversants." The word 'spontaneous' makes conversation potentially challenging.

You do not usually 'prepare' a conversation the way you would with a speech. More often than not, the going is spontaneous. That is to be the problem faced by those who find holding a conversation trying, especially if spontaneity is not their forte.

A conversation is not about having many
concurrent monologues. [Pic]

Let's look at some simple rules to improve your conversation skills:

12. Have a conversation, not a speech

If you would rather talk about yourself and not let anyone else have a chance, give a speech instead. Sometimes, there may be less active participants in the group. You can choose to 'invite' them by asking questions such as, "So, how was your vacation last week?".

11. Involve everyone

Everyone within the group should be active, contributing to the conversation. You should not dominate. Neither should you be passive. Constantly check yourself against the participation level of other members. Whenever you find yourself talking too much or too little, tune your involvement level.

10. Ask questions

Questions can ignite a conversation, making it lively. Simple questions such as "What do you think..?", "What is your favorite..?" can nudge everyone to say something. However, go easy on your questions. It is a conversation that you are a holding, not interrogation.

Use colorful and vibrant words to
liven up conversation. [Pic]

9. Choose your words

A good conversationalist makes good use of descriptive and vibrant words. Use words that help others visualise and feel. Saying that your experience was a 'bad' one is certainly not as lively as saying it was "nerve-wrecking.". See "Choose Your Words".

8. Avoid using jargon or being pompous

Big words are not necessarily impressive, unless you shower them on your English teachers. Use easily understood words and avoid being too technical. Save your jargons for conversations with people in the same fraternity.

Be simple. Be understood. People have been saying "I love you" for centuries". They do not say "I am immensely infatuated by you" for obvious reasons. See "Don't Be A Jargon Junky".

7. Choose appropriate topics

Unless everyone in the group is a fan of Luciano Pavarotti, don't keep going on and on about how you love operas. Choose everyday topics instead. It doesn't mean that you have to confine yourself to talk about the weather. In Singapore, talking about food and shopping can't go very wrong.

In any conversation, you need active listening. [Pic]

6. Listen

Listening to someone is more than just holding back you interruption. You need to be attentive and acknowledge what is being said along the way. If you start to wander off and worry about when you can pick up your kids, you will lose yourself in the conversation. At times, it can be embarrassing.

I wrote about 'active listening' in "Listen! It's Been A Year!". Take a look.

5. Do some homework

If you are meeting someone for the first time, it is a good idea to find out more about him first. You can find out from common acquaintance or get information in the public domain. However, you might not want to be over zealous in showing how much you know about him. It can be creepy and he may think that you have been stalking him. Use the information you know as conversation starter instead. If you found out on social networks that he likes scuba diving, you can ask him if he is into any sports. Let him tell you about scuba diving, not the other way round.

4. Move around

If you are having conversations at social gatherings, move around and mingle with different groups of people. Learning how to cut into a group is part of the social skills you need to acquire. A simple starter such as "Hey! I see that you have something interesting to say about the latest..." would usually earn you the 'right' to join a new conversation group.

You can revive a stalled conversation by
revisiting earlier topics. [Pic]

3. Run out of things to say? Don't panic!

You don't have to feel awkward when where is a prolonged silence in the group. All you have to do is to revisit what was conversed earlier and ask some questions relating to those topics. Say something like "I was thinking about what you said earlier...". Very often, the group would end up starting a new conversation topic. Alternatively, you can scan around the room, pick up some objects and strike a conversation with them. After asking "I wonder who would pay for something like that?", the group should be ready to jump in and start the conversation anew.

2. Be constructive and positive

You do not have to agree with everyone all the time. But, do offer alternative views in a constructive and respectful way. Remember, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. If you are perceived as someone forceful in personal opinion, the other people may find the conversation daunting.

1. Have a graceful exit

All great conversations will come to an end. Do not just walk away. End it with a positive note by saying something such as "It has been enlightening talking to you" or "I hope to catch up with you sometime. See you again".

Conversation can be tough when dealing
with difficult people. [Pic]

Be prepared for difficult conversation

I would not want to make the art of conversation sound overly simplistic. The truth is, some conversations can be very stressful causing much anxiety. Having a conversation with someone who is unreasonable, dishonest, hostile or emotionally wrecked is not fun. In social settings, we can afford to avoid such conversations altogether. However, in life, one needs to survive difficult conversations sometimes, at home or at work. I won't cover much here (maybe another time) but I will leave some references at the end of this article.

Even if you think you generally have little difficulties holding a conversation, you might have some 'bad habits' that you aren't aware of. Take some time to reflect over the above pointers and refine your skills. For those who find it tough to enjoy a conversation, you just have to start doing it. It will get easier.

I will end here by leaving you with some references to help you handle difficult conversations:

"The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right place but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment." ~Dorothy Nevill~

Boost Your Self Esteem: You're Better than You Think You Are

2011-08-15T00:30:00.031+08:00

When you have low self esteem, you do not realize
that you are better than you think you are. [Pic]

Self esteem is your opinion of yourself.

It is important to have a decent level of self esteem. It affects your attitude towards life and eventually the quality of your life.

Regardless of your station in life, your self esteem is capable of dipping. It does not matter what family background you have, which school you attended, what position you hold, which man/woman you marry, how much you have in your bank account and which land you live in, you are susceptible.

The good news is, you are your own architect who can build your own self esteem. You do not necessarily need help from others.

The bad news is, no one but you can pull yourself up from your low point. Others, at best, can bring you closer.

Ask: "How do I feel about who I am?" [Pic]

Why are we having problems with self esteem?

When you feel less worthy, you tend to focus on causes which make you feel that way. You shift your blames to anything and everything you can find around you: your teachers, your parents, your employers, your neighbors, your government or the society and environment at large.

That is to be the main reason why you find it hard to elevate your self esteem: you are looking in the wrong direction.

The one and only person you have to focus on is yourself. All other matters are but the backdrops of your life.

Raising self esteem begins with raising self awareness. [Pic]

What can we do about our self esteem?

I am not spared from having moments of low self esteem. None of us are. What we need to achieve is not a state of perpetual high self esteem. Rather, we need to learn how to bring ourselves up whenever we are down.

Having a healthy level of self esteem means not self hating. However, it does not mean that you have to be narcissistic. It is a balance that is part of the learning.

Your life consists of a potpourri of experiences. The level of your self esteem depends on which part of your life experience you amplify. If you play up bad moments and dismiss good stuff, it is not difficult to understand what emotional state you will get yourself into.

Your self esteem can go either way. It's up to you. [Pic]

Let's have some quick pointers to work on:

8. Learn self-dialog

How you talk to yourself affects your level of confidence and happiness. Just like any dialog with another, you learn to use the right tone and the right words when you have self-dialog. See "Self Dialog: Look Who's Talking?"

7. Record your successes

We tend to be swamped by immediate problems and amplify them. In doing so, we forget our moments of success. To make re-counting those positive moments easier, you can maintain a journal of your accomplishments.

If you let everyone come into your personal space, you would not
have enough space to attend to your inner feelings. [Pic]

6. Maintain personal boundaries

We need our personal space to nourish our emotional health. You would have to learn to say 'No' and discourage others from encroaching into your space. If you constantly give in to other people's demand, you will grow to dislike yourself. You compromise what you really like and over time, your self esteem suffers.

5. Stop thinking in finite terms

Very often, things do not exist in black or white. Manage your self esteem by learning how to glide on the scale of greyness. Learn to replace "I am a total failure" with "I can be better". Notice that "total failure" is finite while "better" is a matter of relativity.

4. Be fair to yourself

If you magnify your failures and dismiss your strength, your self esteem goes down. Learn to see yourself with a positive lens. See failure as a reference point from which you can move forward. See success as affirmation of your strength.

Normalcy is a gift. Don't take it for granted. [Pic]

3. Be a volunteer

You can help and you always can. As a volunteer, you help those in need and at the same time, you help to up your self esteem. One thing for sure, you would be reminded of your own gifts. Normalcy is a gift. Don't take it for granted.

2. Beware of the 'more-is-better' trap

Some people are busy making money for they believe in "The More The Merrier" At some point, after expanding their bank account and material possessions, they wonder why they hit a low point.

The reality is that, the lack of worldly possessions is not the cause of your low self esteem.

1. Keep a healthy lifestyle

Do not ignore your health. If you feel strong and healthy, your self esteem improves. In fact, if you want an instant lift on your self esteem, start exercising and eating healthily.

No one can make you feel low if you
do not allow them to. [Pic]

What are the characteristics of a low self esteem person?

Before we end, let's do a quick diagnostic on the state of your self esteem. If you have most of the characteristics below, you need to work on your self esteem:

Social withdrawal
Anxiety and emotional turmoil
Lack of social skills and self confidence
Depression and/or bouts of sadness
Less social conformity
Eating disorders
Inability to accept compliments
An inability to be fair to yourself
Accentuating the negative
Exaggerated concern over what you imagine other people think
Self neglect
Treating yourself badly but NOT other people
Worrying whether you have treated others badly
Reluctance to take on challenges
Reluctance to put yourself first or anywhere
Reluctance to trust your own opinion
Expecting little out of life for yourself

(source)

You are a gift but you must first unwrap it before the
goodness in it can be shown. [Pic]

Your existence is a gift to this world. However, if you do not unwrap the gift, nothing good can be revealed. Self esteem is all about your ability to bring out your strength and appreciate yourself.

If you are not for yourself, who will be for you?

"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent." ~Eleanor Roosevelt~

Waiting for the Ones: 11-11-11

2011-08-08T00:30:00.016+08:00

What are your thoughts on 11-11-11? [Pic]

On Sep 9 2009, I wrote in "When All The Nines Collide":

"090909 is obviously a unique date and we are only left with just three more similarly 'unique' days: 101010, 111111 and 121212."

In about three months' time, Nov 11 2011 or the "111111" day, will be here. This time, I shall write about it ahead of time.

November 11 is the 315th day of the year. Just like any other day, it is one of the 365 days (366 for leap years) in the Gregorian calendar. However, in 2011, the day will make a never-to-be-repeated date combo of 11-11-11.

Planning to tie the knot on 11-11-11? [Pic]

Many people would have found the date special and have made plans months ahead to spend the day in a memorable way. Among other things, I expect many couples to tie knots on 11-11-11. Well, if that is your plan as well, you have 10 weeks to file your application for marriage at the Registry of Marriages (ROM) ie. Aug 11 to Oct 20 2011.

If you are one of those who are fascinated by the number combo, I have some fascinating facts (and fiction) to share with you.

Make a wish at time 11:11 and see your
wish come true? [Pic]

Time 11:11

When it comes to time, the number 1111 has some strange significance.

Some people believe that if they make a wish each time they see 11:11 on the clock, their wish will come true. I am unable to verify the origin of this belief but I do see people playfully make wishes at the 11th minute of the 11th hour.

So, does it mean that on 11-11-11, at 11:11, your biggest wish will come true? At least, someone must have believed it enough to create a Fecebook page with the title 'Nov 11, 2011, at 11:11 your biggest wish will come true.11/11/11 11:11'.

Remembrance Day

At the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918, World War I ended. Today, Nov 11 is marked as the 'Remembrance Day'. It is a memorial day observed in Commonwealth countries to remember the members of their armed forces who have died on duty in the war.

Leonardo DiCaprio: 37th Birthday
on 11-11-11 [Pic: Wiki]

Happy Birthday!

Leonardo DiCaprio, well known for his lead role in Titanic, was born on 11 Nov 1974. He will be celebrating this 37th birthday on 11-11-11.

The 'Palindrome Number' game

When you multiply '11', '111', '1111' and so on, with itself, you will get a palindrome number.

A palindrome number is a number which remains the same when read from left to right or the other way round. '123454321' is an example.

Take out your calculator now and see some creation of palindrome numbers when you use the fascinating 'ones':

111111 x 111111 = 12345654321

111111111 x 111111111 = 12345678987654321

"11-11-11" the movie will be released
on 11-11-11. [Source]

"11-11-11", the movie

Well, no prize for getting it right, the movie will be officially released on 11-11-11. The storyline evolves around the '11:11 phenomenon' with strange happenings and constant sightings of the number 11. In the story, '11-11-11' is more than just a date. It is a 'warning'.

The movie is directed by Darren Lynn Bousman, the same director for Saw II, Saw III and Saw IV. I do not suppose the movie is meant for the fainthearted. Watch the trailer.

The 'Singles Day'

This day is also known as 'One's Day' or 'Guang Gun Jie' (光棍节) and it is celebrated by singles in China. This pop culture is believed to have originated from the Nanjing University in 1993.

'Guang Gun' (光棍) means 'bachelor' in Chinese. The date 11-11 is chosen because it consists of four 'ones'.

Demographically, China is experiencing one of the worst gender ratio imbalance in the world. It was reported that, the 2010 figures showed a ratio of '119 boys born per 100 girls'. The ratio went as high as 140:100 in some rural areas. At this rate, we can expect more bachelors to be celebrating the 'Singles Day' in the years to come.

Pepero Day in Korea is celebrated like
Valentine's Day. [Source]

The 'Pepero Day'

While the bachelors in China celebrate their 'single' status, young people in Korea celebrate the 'Pepero Day' on the same day.

Pepero is a brand of cookie stick dipped in chocolate sauce and it has been a popular snack in Korea since the 1980s. The day is so-called because 11-11 resembles four Pepero sticks.

In Korea, 'Pepero Day' is akin to 'Valentine's Day'. On this day, couples exchange Pepero sticks and other gifts to reaffirm their special relationship. Some would even time their exchange at 11:11. (see article)

The world is going to end on 11-11-11? [Pic]

The unknown

There are many other suggestions in the Internet about the meaning of '11-11-11'. Many of them are mysterious and mind-boggling, relating to prophecy, astrology and divinity. Some people question if that day would be the 'end of the world' while some believe it will be the day a 'New World' will be created.

I do not know enough to believe or dismiss any of those suggestions. However, I do believe that the special number combo has triggered many unusual ideas.

11-11-11 is three months away. You have time to decide how you would like to make that day special for you. For me, it is going to be just another 'TGIF' day.

"Men willingly believe what they wish." ~Julius Caesar~

Say "NO" to Bear Farming

2011-08-01T00:30:00.006+08:00

Help end bear farming. Source

Bear bile farming is a shameful trade and you ought to know.

Bile is a bitter fluid produced by liver to aid digestion. Since ancient time, this extract from the gall bladder of bears has been used as a useful ingredient in the traditional Chinese medicine (TCM). Since the 1980s, bear farming was carried out in China to meet increasing demand. The scale grew out of control. Today, there are a few hundred such farms capturing tens of thousands of bears.

A bear farm in appalling conditions. Source: wspa

What is bear farming?

Bear farming involves caging bears in tiny spaces. This to restrict their movement to facilitate extraction of bile juice via a catheter. The captured bear would have a tube extending into its gall bladder for the rest of its life.

'The rest of its life' is sadly a short span of time. Between age five to ten, the bears stop producing bile. They are then put away to die of illness or killed for their paws and gall bladders.

Source: Animals Asia

During bile milking, the bears suffer such unimaginable physical pain and mental stress that they would normally exhibit disturbing behaviors. They were seen to be banging their heads against the cages, gnawing on the cage bars and chewing their own paws. Most of them suffer from skin sores and malnutrition.

The process of bile extraction is crude. A rubber tube is surgically inserted into the gall bladder. It is placed to run under the skin up to the thigh where the bile juice is collected. The surgery is done by untrained farmers. The bears would suffer during the procedure and there have been many incidents of death due to complications.

Here are more picture on bear farming.

Bear bile products. Source: Bush Warriors

Why go after bear bile?

The value of bear bile comes from a chemical known as ursodeoxycholic acid (UDCA). It is used by TCM practitioners who believe that it has properties that help to reduce fever and protect the liver, among other things.

Nothing is of any commercial value unless it is sought after. Bear products are widely banned but they were reported to be readily available in the U.S. (91%), Malaysia (78%), Japan (77%), and Singapore (74%), closely followed by Canada (67%), Indonesia (62%), Australia (49%) and Taiwan (30%).

Bear products stay in demand because people continue to believe in its benefits. Few were aware that in modern chemistry, cheaper and equally effective alternative medicines are available. Most importantly, many are clueless about the horrendous cruelty that went into the products.

Bile milking. Source: Bush Warriors

Who cares?

For a long time, many people in and outside China were unaware of this cruel practice. In recent years, pressure has been mounting locally and internationally to end bear farming. Somehow, the Chinese Government has been slow in giving due attention to the matter and they barely bow to the demand from lobbyists.

A baby step was taken in 2000 to act against the cruel acts. In July that year, the Animals Asia Foundation signed an agreement with the Chinese Government to remove 500 endangered Moon Bears from the worst bile farms in Sichuan province. The agreement has an eventual goal of ending the bile trade.

Here is a video on the bear rescue.

Billboard in Beijing: "Rescue Black Bears. Give Up Bear Bile."
Source: Animals Asia

You can help!

Meanwhile, here are some of the things you can do to help end bear farming:

- Do not support bile trades

- Support "Say No to Bear Bile" Campaign

- Get involved

- Donate

- Sign a petition

- Learn more about it

There are many articles in the Internet and here is one by GreenMuze. You can also watch this video by Jackie Chan (成龙) who teamed up with the World Society for the Protection of Animals (WSPA) to create awareness. Karen Mok (莫文蔚) also teamed up with Animals Asia Foundation and gave the same message in a separate video.

Lastly, you can spread the words to raise awareness. Share this article with your friends. No one should stay ignorant about bear farming.

Read A Pet is for Life, Animal Cruelty: Who Will Cry For The Abuser?, Please Free The Dolphins and other stories in My Animal Planet

"One of the ill effects of cruelty is that it makes the bystanders cruel." ~Thomas Fowell Buxton~

Shake Hands, Shake Them Right

2011-07-25T00:30:00.002+08:00

A handshake is usually the first physical contact when
two persons first meet. [Pic]

Everyone knows how to shake hands but not everyone does it right.

A handshake is a form of human communication ritual that is commonly practiced across geographical and cultural borders. The exact origin of this ritual is unknown. Some historians suggest that it might have started as early as the 5th Century BC during the Ancient Greece times.

A handshake is more than just for saying 'Hi!'. During the medieval times, two men would grasp each other's bare hand to show that they were free from concealed weapons. In a way, a handshake is to demonstrate openness between two persons.

Allowing another to enter our personal space is
an indication of acceptance. [Pic]

Human beings need physical personal space to feel safe and secure. Establishing physical contacts between two persons means breaking into each other's 'safe zones'. That would need some amount of trust.

The same idea is also extended to the geek world. In information technology, handshaking describes a process where a computer communicates and connects with another device such as a printer.

Today, we usually shake hands with another without much contemplation. Many may have missed out or forgotten some 'good practices' when it comes of a good business handshake.

Let's look at some of these 'rules' again:

12. Be the first mover: Be ready to extent your hand in one confident move.

11. Don't 'squeeze': You grasp firmly but not too tightly.

10. Dry your palms: If you have sweaty palms, wipe them dry first.

09. Warm your cold hands: Holding a cold fish in the hand is not a good feeling. Give your hands a good rub before grabbing someone's hand.

08. Use your right hands: Sorry lefties, the use of your left hands can be odd and in some cultures, offensive.

07. Say something: A silent handshake can be awkward. A simple 'how do you do' would go well with this age-old ritual.

06. Make eye contact: Establishing a quick eye contact is a good way to establish a positive human relationship. I said a quick eye contact, not stare.

05. Smile: This is an universal language to mean 'friendliness'. A firm and sincere handshake and a sulky face simply don't gel.

04. Note cultural difference: Do expect some variations across cultures. In some situations, it might not be acceptable for men to shake the hands of their female counterparts. Do your homework first.

03. Let go: Don't grasp for too long. It may seem like eternity to the other person.

02. Bear with your discomfort: Even if you feel disgusted by the touch of a sweaty palm, do not wipe your hand on your pants in front of the other person.

01. Do not reject: It is offensive to reject an handshake without a good reason. Unless your religion or culture suggests that it would be inappropriate to do so, you are expected to reciprocate. Well, I suppose you could be excused if you have an injured hand.

Give a good first impression by giving
a good handshake. [Pic]

It won't be wise to under-estimate the importance of a good handshake in the business world. The first impression counts and part of the impression comes from how your do the handshake.

Handshaking is an art. The next time you shake some hands, shake them right.

"Each contact with a human being is so rare, so precious, one should preserve it." ~Anaïs Nin~

Be a "Better Me" Everyday

2011-07-18T00:30:00.040+08:00

"Wherever you are, whatever your age you're only
a thought away from changing your life." (Wayne Dyer) [Pic]

Need some motivation?

The answer is always 'yes'. No one ever complains about having too much motivation. However, some of us may have wondered why some people are often more motivated than others. First of all, let's see what you think of the more motivated people.

When you compare yourself with those individuals, what are your immediate thoughts?

"He has a more supportive family"?
"He has more encouraging friends"?
"He has a more understanding boss"?

.. or do you simply dismiss it as "He is luckier and is bothered by less troubles"?

We become what we think and believe [Pic]

You are who you think you are

We seldom point the questions to ourselves. Instead, we make unhelpful comments such as:

"I am born like that."
"I am not an important member."
"I am not worthy of a promotion."
"I am not attractive to others."

If you usually do what I have just described, you are doing things the other way round. You focus on the perceived goodness in the surrounding rather than on yourself. At the same time, you are over critical of yourself. That probably explains why you are not as motivated.

Self-dialogue shapes your subconscious mind. [Pic]

Positive self-talk is the way

Your level of motivation would have been very different if you choose to 'converse' with yourself this way:

"What has he done right that I have not?"
"What is the one thing I can do differently, immediately?"
"I can be better in (something) if I try hard enough."
"I am unique in my own way and I have my own niche."

Making positive self-talk allows you to explore your subconscious self.

You are very much controlled by your subconscious mind and your behaviors are shaped by what you subconsciously believe. However, many of us are not fully aware of what goes on in our mind.

No one can make you frustrated if you are not 'programmed' to feel frustrated by another person's action. Things around you don't make you frustrated but your subconscious mind does.

Your behavior is controlled by your subconscious mind. [Pic]

The good news is that our mind can be re-programmed. To feel motivated, you would need to discard your dis-empowering beliefs. Make positive self-talk your way of life and see your subconscious mind being shaped into energy-charging beliefs.

According to the 'Law of Repetition', you would reinforce what you repeatedly do. You will not be fully convinced of the need to change unless your subconscious mind agrees to change. When you repeatedly 'talk' to your subconscious mind, you reinforce the positive idea and make it permanent.

Give up the ideal of "I want to be the best" for it does not necessarily mean much. Instead, strive to be a "Better Me" everyday. It is important that you keep your motivation level decent. An automobile without fuel is not going to go anywhere.

I hope this article makes a 'better you' in some way.

You might want to read:

Self Dialog: Look Who's Talking?

"I don't think much of individuals who are not wiser today than they were yesterday. ~ Abraham Lincoln

A Pet is for Life

2011-07-11T00:30:00.012+08:00

Be a responsible pet owner. [Pic]

At the SPCA, an average of 600 animals are taken in every month. Some are lost pets but many are abandoned or given up.

Some simple numbers taken from the SPCA website:

"In 2010, we took in 7,597 animals. These included unwanted pets (cats, dogs, rabbits and hamsters) and strays (cats and dogs). 1,412 of the animals we received were pedigree dogs. On average, only 33 dogs, 37 cats and 29 small animals are adopted from the SPCA each month."

The numbers in earlier years are not good-looking too:

2007: 9,487
2008: 8,738
2009: 7,678

Give a homeless animal a second chance. [Pic]

This gives us some sensing on the scale of the problem. Yet, we are just looking at one animal welfare organization. There are many more in Singapore and they too have a consistent story to tell.

This is what you get out of ignorance and irresponsibility.

The cuteness of little animals often attract instant fondness for them. Unfortunately, when reality sinks in and when they out-grow their cuteness, their fates change.

Don't buy pets on the spur of
the moment. [Pic]

It is also common to find great enthusiasm in getting animals related to the zodiac of the lunar year or buy a bunny for Easter. The sale of puppies soars in the Year of the Dog and the same for bunnies in the Year of the Rabbit.

Many of these animals do not get the attention they need after the initial excitement wears off. Their impulsive or ill-informed owners resort to giving them up at the shelters or simply abandon them on the streets.

I believe this happens everyday, everywhere.

Many pedigrees are given up each year. [Pic]

The fate of the pedigrees are not necessarily better. SPCA took in 7,597 animals in 2010. 1,412 of them were pedigree dogs. It always perplexes me to see unprepared and impulsive pet owners spend a fortune on pedigrees only to discard them later.

Owning a pet is a lifetime of commitment. We are talking about their lives and we are talking about our responsibility. Before you become a pet owner, be informed first. Consider adoption. Don't buy.

A pet is for life. Help spread the words.

Here are some pictures taken from the Singapore SPCA Cattery.

Many animals in the shelters are waiting for adoption. [Pic]

Not every animal is suitable for adoption. [Pic]

Due to low level of adoptions, a large number of
animals are put to sleep each month. [Pic]

Around 20,000 cats and dogs are put down
every year in Singapore. (AVA) [Pic]

Culling the strays need not be the only solution. [Pic]

Sterilization can help to control the
number of strays. [Pic]

A pet can cost you thousands of dollars
in its lifetime. [Pic]

Culling stray cats not the way: Khaw [Pic]

Cats are banned in HDB flats. [Pic]

Many await a reversal of the HDB ruling. [Pic]

A little animal is a not a soft toy.
Don't buy it as a gift. [Pic]

Keeping a pet comes with its responsibilities.
It is not unlike having a child. [Pic]

A single female cat takes just 7 years to be the
source of 20,000 new kittens! (SPCA) [Pic]

Everyone can help promote kindness
towards animals. [Pic]

A pet is a lifetime of commitment.
A dog or a cat will live 10-20 years [Pic]

Animals given up to the SPCA may be
put to sleep in 24 hours. [Pic]

SPCA distributes free sterilization vouchers
to the public. [Pic]

You might also want to read:
Don't Buy Rabbits in the Year of the Rabbit
Please Free The Dolphins

Animal Cruelty: Who Will Cry For The Abuser?

How Much Our Pets Cost in a Lifetime

"If we cannot be clever, we can always be kind." ~Alfred Fripp~